Are You Bound By Boundaries?

Is it possible that having no boundaries  is enlightenment, and the freedom to consider and to choose and to own  the possibility of living powerfully with no boundaries is transformation?

Look at the sky at night and see worlds upon worlds upon worlds, galaxy upon galaxy, without end.  We are told that space is infinite, with no end...
What do you REALLY see?  
I see no boundaries. 
When I look at your face watching mine as I love you, I see no boundaries. 
When I consider what's absolutely possible for every single human being I see no boundaries.
When I imagine how life could truly be for every one of the billions of people in this world, I see no boundaries. 

Yet what would life in this world of ours be like with no boundaries? We have natural corporeal frames. We're not invisible. We exist.  We have zip codes, capital cities, states and counties. We have insurance numbers and passports.  We're expected to drive in our lane on our side of the road. We knock or ring the door bell when we arrive for a visit at someones home. We shake hands when we greet.  We kiss when we meet and say goodbye.  We have manners and we take or give right of way in everything from walking through a door to changing lanes on the motorway/ freeway.  Societal protocols guide us to agreeing that we don't enter someones personal space without permission.

So, evidently there are physical and abstract boundaries everywhere, and we've got no means to be without them or to avoid them. We haven't got wings to fly over them or past them, and we don't skirt around them. Where, then, is the context of no boundaries?

They are in our own being, in that profoundly moving moment of self awareness ... this is where there are patently no boundaries. There's no realm of 'no boundaries' to go to. There's no place without edges anywhere on Earth. The realm of no boundaries is a realm to come from. 
HERE IS WHERE IT IS, NOW IS WHEN IT IS, YOU ARE WHAT IT IS
In reality: This is where it always is. It's been here for all eternity right up until this very moment. It'll be here from this very moment to beyond the end of time. 

The physical boundaries of which side of the road to drive on, what zip code to mail your electricity bill to, the proper way to set a dinner table for your guests, the date by which to pay your property taxes on etc, and the abstract boundaries of being appropriate, respecting privacy etc, demand and command respect - or life doesn't work. 

But when I'm really with you in the moment, if I don't grant you permission to be who you really are around me, if I don't give you the space to have the experience you're having, if I am investing my time in you having another experience other than  the experience you're having, when I'm engaged in the boundaries you've determined for yourself, it is at that moment I become your co-dependent in keeping you small, limited, confined. If I have prevented from you from discovering who you really are I will be denying and precluding you from the possibility of transforming your life...and I cannot, and I refuse, to do that.  And you should refuse anyone from doing that to you.

Until there's transformation, the possibility of living a life with no boundaries is completely unreal. The miracle of transformation is it restores reality to no boundaries, and leads us to who we really are. It also allows us to conform to boundaries without seeing them as an intrusion on our own.

If a person intentionally drives on the wrong side of the road they are an idiot. And if they drive on the correct side of the road while resenting the rules and nature of boundaries, they're still a fool. 

Choose to live from no boundaries ... AND ... drive, without questioning it, on the correct side of the road because that's what it takes to make a life with no boundaries work. 

What is, is....and what isn't, isnt!

Close But No Cigar!

Well...we tried...we almost made it...
close but no cigar...

Perseverance!!!
That's what we need.

Sometimes when the going gets tough the tough give up.  They throw in their cards, they fold 'em.

Many people have a default setting of:
If at first you don't succeed: Self-destruct!

There is the famous story about a gold mine somewhere in America.  The people knew the gold was there, they were digging and digging but...nothing.

They gave up!  They sold the land.

The people who bought the land dug three feet away from where the previous miners had dug...They struck gold.

The first lot of miners had no idea just how close they were to striking gold when they gave up!

When you think about giving in, giving up, throwing in your cards, folding them, cashing your chips in...whatever way you want to dress up the fact that you have given up, think of this...

De-Stress your Dis-Stress

"A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As they raised a glass of water, everyone expected they'd be asked the "half empty or half full" question. Instead they inquired: "How heavy is this glass of water?"

Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.

The psychologist replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes."

Holding onto things for too long can have a detrimental effect on us.  We become attached to things that we shouldn't and also to things that don't, and will never, serve us.

What's more, how are we going to grab an opportunity when it appears if our hands are full from holding onto something for no valid reason?

The majority of people carry their past around with them.  This is EXHAUSTING!  What's more, as you look ahead to the future, you want a big, clear space to fill with all of your hopes, dream, ideas and aspirations.  Unfortunately, you have your past in there too, taking up space, because you insist on carrying it for too long.

"The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything."

"It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don't carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down!"

A Million Pound/Dollar/Euro Lesson

“Always carry a notebook”:

Aristotle Onassis.

Why? Simple. You try and remember everything you see and hear on a daily basis. There are so many ideas, bits of information, names, words, slogans, websites and people that pass through your mind that you will never remember them. If you see as many people as I do, and speak to as many people as I do, on a daily basis then you would realize that a Journal or notebook is invaluable.


I don't mean a computer or iPad either. I mean a Journal or Notebook that you write in by hand.

This is the single most valuable piece of advice I have ever had.

I carry a black moleskin notebook at all times and I always have a small black moleskin notebook in a jacket pocket. Sometimes it's an A4 size legal notebook with perforated pages that can be torn out and filed.  I always carry a pen but if you want to, go into any betting shop or catalogue showroom that has those little pens for customers use, grab a handful and put one in the pocket of every jacket you own.

I then read what I have written at the end of the day or week, or if I am taking a break or being driven somewhere in the car and all the stuff I think I need to keep I transfer into an A4 size Journal.

I have about 20 of those...full.

Not only did Onassis live by this belief but so too does Richard Branson. (Click his name to read his thoughts on notetaking!)  Everywhere he goes he carries a notebook.  It is IMPOSSIBLE to remember EVERYTHING you think and read and hear.

You can watch something, listen to something or experience something but if you WRITE IT DOWN it becomes hardwired into your brain. What's more...you start to understand it a lot better if you write it down.

I went and saw my friend Ross Jeffries one day in London when he was presenting a training program and he wanted to chat over Lunch. I had taken with me, in my bag, one of my journals from four years earlier when he had spoken to a group before and I had been there.

(I make a hell of a lot of notes)

During the afternoon session he started to tell the group of a poem he had written many years ago, a funny one about Speed Seduction and NLP techniques...but he couldn't remember it!

Out came the journal and he was amazed to see it written there from four years ago. Afterwards he told me 'Jeez, that journal is impressive'.

I was impressed he could read my handwriting!!!

The point is this. If you get an idea, write it down. If you hear a remark and think it's interesting, write it down.

Whenever you engage in any form of interaction, if you use persuasion, speed seduction, embedded commands, language patterns, sales pitches...write down everything.

What do I mean?

1. Where you were. If you went to a coffee shop write down 'went to coffee shop'!!!

2. Name of person you spoke to.

3. What you said.

4. responses.

5. Outcome.

Then...yes, you read it back and analyse it.

"When you meet someone, write down everything you know about them. That way you know how much time to give them next time."
- Aristotle Onassis
Write down everything. Phone numbers, web addresses, names, tips, ideas, plans, phrases….
I guarantee that if you don’t write it down you will try to remember it later and that’s all you will do, ‘try’.
Believe me, 'try' is a very bad word and you need to eliminate it from your vocabulary.

You won’t remember it if you haven't written it down. If, by some miracle you do manage to remember what you wanted to remember, I also guarantee that something else will drop out of your memory to make way for it.

Want to risk it? No, I didn't think you would!

One Direction

- Updated

“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?”
“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,” said the cat.
“I don’t much care where…” said Alice.
“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” said the cat.
Alice in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll

The cat was right.

If you don't know where you are going you may as well stay where you are.

Some people don't know where they ARE let alone where they want to go.

A compass has 360 degrees or points, and if you do not know where you are, you have 359 chances out of 360 to go where you didn't want to be in the first place.

So if you are at a point in your life that you can build upon that will impel you towards your goal or target then great. But what if you are not?

You need to focus on what you want. Your destination.

You need a road map!

Nobody says 'let's go on holiday' and then gets in the car drives off and waits to see where they end up.

If I asked you to meet me in London and you were in Manchester, there is a big chance that you might look at a map or turn on your Sat-Nav .

You must start with the destination in mind. You have to have a clear defined and resolute goal or target and then you must aim at it. If not, you are going to drift through life and end up as one of the masses. You will have wasted your life, wasted your potential, wasted your dreams and aspirations.

The UK at the moment is made up of some startling facts and figures...

• 100% of the population want to be successful
• 80% of families didn’t buy or read a book last year
• 75% of teenagers want to be famous but have no idea what for
• 70% of adults haven’t been to a bookshop in 5 years
• 60% of all paperbacks sold are romance
• 58% of graduates never read another book after graduating
• 50% of hardback books bought are never read past page 22
• 48% of all hardbacks sold are romance
• 40% of all men don’t read anything except at work
• 32% of men read nothing but newspaper sports pages

Out of 100 people who started work at the age of 18, by the age of 65....

• 1 is a millionaire
• 3 are still working
• 4 have adequate capital to retire
• 29 are dead
• 63 are dependent on social security, friends, relatives or charity

Only 5% of the adult population can comfortably retire at 65.

The other 95% are dead, broke, or dead broke!

But...when you consider the resources around us right now...

IN A WORLD WHERE ONE THIRD OF THE POPULATION IS STILL A TWO-DAY WALK FROM A TELEPHONE...YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE FOR NOT BEING SUCCESSFUL!

Remember that compass I mentioned? ...

Those 360 points on the compass? ...

What's YOUR point?

All aboard the Leader-Ship!

Leader- Ship!

* Do you have a crew?
* Who is in your Crew?
* Do you know who
your passengers are?
* Where do you get your passengers from?
* Are you the Captain of your Leader Ship?

WHO IS ON BOARD YOUR LEADER-SHIP?

Have you ever been on board a ship? It really doesn’t matter whether it’s a large cruise liner or a cross channel ferry. The principle is always the same.

The Captain.The captain or master is the ship's highest responsible officer, acting on behalf of the ship's owner. The captain is legally responsible for the day to day affairs of the ship as he is in command. It is his responsibility to ensure that all the departments under him perform legally to the requirements of the ships owner. The Captain represents the owner, or could also BE the owner.

The Chief Officer. He is the head of the deck and second-in-command after the ship's Captain. The chief Officers primary responsibilities are the vessel's cargo operations, its stability, and supervising the deck crew. The Chief Officer is responsible for the safety and security of the ship, as well as the welfare of the crew on board. The chief Officer typically stands the navigation watch with an eye on the horizon. Additional duties include maintenance of the ship. The Chief Officer also trains the crew on various aspects like safety, firefighting, search and rescue, and various other contingencies. The chief officer assumes command of the whole ship in the absence of the Captain.

The Second Officer. The second officer is usually in charge of navigation and is the next licensed position above third officer and below chief officer as third-in-command. The second officer is typically the navigation officer aboard a ship.

Third Officer.The third officer is primarily charged the safety of the ship and crew. The third officer is the next license position on board the Ship, being fourth-in-command after the captain, first officer, and second officer.

Now let’s look at this in a different way.

Let’s imagine we are not talking about a Ship.Let’s talk about a company.Your Company.

You have a Ship/Company that you want to sail.You launch it and its full steam ahead.Your passengers are your Customers.If they enjoy the trip, and the customer service is excellent then they will book again.

The Captain is YOU! 
You are the Leader, the CEO. You are the one in overall command of the Ship/Company. You are the one that decides direction and destination.Your Crew/Team will come to you with ideas to make the cruise more enjoyable for the passengers/customers, and will run ideas past you as to new and exciting destinations for you to steer towards. You need a great crew/team and your ability to recruit, mentor, promote and empower your people is the reason your ship/company will be successful.They are the driving force, the lifeblood of your business.

The Chief Officer is your Director.
They have the day to day running of the company in mind.The navigation, the speed, the training of your staff, the planning…yes, you are the overall person in charge but you have mentored and coached this person in such a way that when you ‘go ashore’ you are confident that what you would have done if you had been on board is being done while you are not on board.

The Second Officer is your Manager.
They maintain and steer your company on the course set by you and your Director.They ensure that you arrive at the relevant port on schedule (your company hits target) and that the seas are navigated in a safe way (your customers have a smooth ride) while keeping an eye out for icebergs (challenges, roadblocks and complaints).They report back regularly and advise you and your Director of the potential difficulties (competition activities, current trends, feedback from customers).They also manage your team directly and monitor their performance.They have targets to reach, staff levels to maintain and results to achieve.

The Third Officer is your HR or Compliance Officer.
They are in charge of the safety and compliance with the law of your company and its entire staff.They ensure that the documentation, contracts, employment law and entitlements of all of your staff, and you, are adhered to in a manner that is conducive to all.

The Crew is your team.
All of them from the engine room to client facing are signed up and ready to provide the experience that your passengers have not only paid for, but expect.  This can only come from you and your officers by example.When your crew feel safe, feel they can approach you, listen to you, admire you, know that you are decisive and that you are willing to listen to them AND include them because you consider their opinions and ideas relevant, you can sail any sea.

A Captain is usually someone who has started out as a sailor and worked their way up through the ranks to Captain.In doing so, they have a great understanding of how each section, from the Bridge to the Engine Room, works and they could, at any time, step in if disaster happens in ANY of those areas.

A great leader is also someone who can step in at any level because, not only do they have a deep understanding of what the business is and how it runs but they spend time walking around, talking, getting involved and relating to people at all of those levels.

If your Ship is called ‘Leader’ then the only way to ensure your ‘Leader-Ship’ is sailing on calm waters, fully crewed with full capacity of passengers at all times is to not only have a crew that you trust, but to have a crew that trusts you! You are confident that when you 'step ashore' the ship is running EXACTLY as it would if you were on the bridge.

Your Passengers are your customers and clients.
They will book a voyage on your Leader Ship in full knowledge that they have peace of mind.  Whatever happens, however rough the seas, when the storms hit, you and your officers and crew will navigate them through to calmer seas.

Bon Voyage!

Don't Quote Me On That, But...

Sometimes I get a Bright Idea!

"It is just as if I plug myself into myself and I light up!" was how someone described this process once....

When working on a presentation I have been known to say things that are a complete surprise to me, not just because it's the first time I have heard them too, they sometimes come up to the surface of my memory, but because I think 'Hmm. that's a keeper' and they go in the file of 'To be used again at the relevant moment!'

Lately, during a seminar, some tweetchats (#HPTTransformation and #PeopleSkills) and a couple of HOA's things came up and it happened again....

Bad leadership is self-serving - Great leadership is serving others.

I don't say this to impress you, I say this to impress upon you that.......you can do this too

Don't sell the means; people buy the end!!!

This may be the crack in the wall through which you will see the world.

If you are going to go fishing, bait your hook with something the fish likes and not YOUR favourite food.

Don't 'assume' your client is as clued up as you...think about it...it's your job to know what it does, it's their job to use it.

When people believe they can do something, or if they believe they can't, they are right on both occasions.

I don't need to be your friend for you to trust what I say will work.

You don't need to be my friend for me to make you more successful.

You don't need to be my friend for me to change your life for the better.

People don't get stuck in what happened to them, they get stuck in the significance of that event.

There are certain things you can only know by creating them yourself.

We are in a society where we are looking around for leaders, When in fact we should be looking for the leaders within ourselves.

Irrespective of conditions or outside influence, transformation can happen at any time. People have the ability to Transform.

It’s not what you think that changes your life; it is the space in which that thinking takes place.

Common Sense isn't all that common.

You have to live your life in a ‘you AND me’ world and not a ‘you OR me’ world.

The majority of people are motivated by the avoidance of what they don’t want rather than the attainment of what they do want.

If you create a context of well being in your life, the circumstances in your life will reflect that.

You are living in the past at today’s prices.

The trouble with talking too fast or talking a lot is you may say something you haven’t thought of yet!  If that's the case, write it down!

This is why I keep hammering home the point about always keeping a notebook! ;-)
The NOTEBOOK post

(Thanks to +Angela Goodeve for the artwork in this image)

Don't Try This At Home, I Am A Professional

I have just 'repaired' the printer in my office by using the 'Gucci Shoe method'.

The Possessed Printer

Its very technical and not something I would recommend you attempt. You need to call in a professional like me

Basically, you open various sections of the printer and peer inside looking for evidence of a problem. Then you take the toner cartridge out, shake it, and put it back in. Then you take the cartridge out again, shake it harder (like that will make a difference) and then ram it back in so it makes a loud crashing sound in the hope that the force and noise of this will make the printer wake up.

You then close all of the various panels and flaps that you opened. You switch the power off and on and then stare at it.

Finally you take your shoe off and whack it a few times until you beat it into submission. Works every time....

...It also amazes me how some people keep pressing print when nothing comes out and then complain that the printer is broke only to find no paper in it. Then when they put the paper in 45 copies of what they wanted comes out and they moan about that!!

That's when you take your shoe off and whack THEM over the head.

I have also found that a laser printer can be bought for less than the cost of a laser toner cartridge.

I bought a laser printer and it came with a toner in it AND a spare toner.

The printer was £80 including 2 toner cartridges.
The toner cartridges are £90 if bought on their own!!!!

I now have two laser printers gathering dust in the stock cupboard as its more cost effective, when the toner runs out, to buy a new printer.

THE WORLD HAS GONE MAD!!!!

The Secret to Have, Be and Do Anything you want!

Let’s cut away the fallacy from the facts…

“These secrets are known to the chosen few people.” 
That is absolutely true.

“Who are these people?” 

They are members of Companies, societies and organizations around the world, but they are NOT the secret underground, Area 51, for your eyes only, stealth, need to know basis, loved by conspiracy theorists Gray Men people think are lurking in the background. 

They are people who belong to Companies, Businesses, organizations and groups who know these secrets and who pass this information on to a select few.  The average guy has no chance of gaining membership and receiving all the benefits from the knowledge, networking opportunities and associations these societies offer…UNLESS, they were invited, proposed and accepted.

That is one reason the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

Most of the secret societies are not really a secret at all. It’s what goes on INSIDE the societies that is the big secret! It’s how its members work together that is a secret!

When you are a member of one of these organizations or societies you LEARN a new way of doing things,  of how to obtain incredible wealth, power, luck, control, happiness, romantic love… You learn how to CONTROL all situations in your life and how to make all events turn out for YOUR advantage. You are taught secrets that can allow you to HAVE…BE....and DO...ANYTHING and EVERYTHING YOU WANT!

These secrets,

WHEN APPLIED CORRECTLY,

CAN make all your dreams come true!

The questions I get asked are...

“WHAT exactly are these secrets?

“HOW do I apply these discoveries for wealth, power, luck, love and romance in my personal life and make it work for me?

AND —

How can I get this knowledge without being a member of these societies, companies or organizations, so I can BE, DO, and HAVE EVERYTHING I WANT “FAST?”

Now those questions are being answered! Whatever YOUR dreams in life are....they CAN be achieved!

I have been a member of some of these organizations and societies and my only reason for doing so was to get where I am today!  I joined to learn the secrets of making incredible amounts of money, having major successes in business and improving my life and the lives of the people around me in all areas.

I am now willing to REVEAL these secrets to a few select people including YOU. These secrets have been kept exclusive to members only — up until now!

These secrets are SO powerful

and work so fast

that they AMAZE all who use them.

When used correctly, whatever you want in life can come RUSHING to you like it is being pulled by a magic magnet.

WARNING! Money can come to you so fast and in such large amounts, it will frighten you!   (I know this sounds too good to be true, but it IS TRUE…and it is as good as it sounds!)

I am the ONLY person to have been given, and to have acquired this information who is willing to pass THE COMPLETE INFORMATION on to people outside of those organizations, businesses and societies.  Imagine having ME ‘PERSONALLY’ teach YOU how to apply this most powerful secret technology in YOUR life and help MAKE ALL YOUR DREAMS AND WISHES COME TRUE!

For the first time ever you will have revealed to you the secrets that were previously exclusive to members of these groups! Now, for THE FIRST TIME, someone is willing teach YOU exactly how to use these powerful secrets in YOUR life and make them WORK for YOU....in RECORD SPEED!  And that person…is ME!

You will learn how to HAVE, BE AND DO ANYTHING YOU DESIRE!

Imagine having ME as your PERSONAL mentor to teach YOU the secrets to making more money faster than you ever thought possible, have unlimited power in your personal life, have the most amazing romantic relationship you could imagine, have amazing health and vitality, become lucky in everything you do, control all people and situations in life, and have the financial freedom to enjoy your life like never before!

As you know, these companies, organizations and  societies include many wealthy and powerful people. I have talked with and confer with many of these members.

HERE IS A VERY IMPORTANT POINT!

In all the books and seminars you have read or watched, in person, on tape, on DVD or on the Internet, you have ONLY EVER been given enough information to make you want more.  The people promising you answers are not going to give you THEIR secrets because they don’t want the competition.  They are just going to tell you enough to make a slight increase in the levels of your life so that you see an improvement.  So that you think ‘it worked’ but then…nothing else happens.  If you are happy with that then stop reading now.

Here is the difference that MAKES the difference:

I UNDERSTAND how it works AND I AM GOING TO SHARE THE COMPLETE PROCESS WITH YOU. 

So...

Here is the shocker, you better sit down:  Unlike the others I DON’T CARE HOW SUCCESSFUL OR RICH YOU BECOME because I don’t see you as a threat to ME…I KNOW THERE IS ENOUGH WEALTH IN THE UNIVERSE TO GO AROUND…IT IS ABUNDANT.  THERE IS ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE. 

The ONLY barrier to your success is YOU!

I have associated with some of the most successful and powerful people on the planet. This creates a “master mind” group – making the society even more powerful, and membership even more beneficial. When you associate and learn from super successful people, it actually DOES rub off on you —— YOU are changed for the better!

See it as the ULTIMATE CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE AND SUCCESS...And the best part of a circle is....?  BEING ON THE INSIDE!

Think about it…dream about it…AND watch for the next post when you will be given the opportunity of your lifetime.

In the mean time...think of this...

WHAT WAS YOUR LIFE LIKE FIVE YEARS AGO?

See you soon... 

MOVE!

Flow, like water...Be flexible...whoever has flexibility in a situation controls the situation....

but remember that as Leaders we must move forward, and keep moving...

and never, EVER, stop moving...

Has Your Reality Check Bounced?

IS YOUR BELIEF A REALITY?

Beliefs are, in the majority of cases, a lie. They are not the truth.  The truth has to be experienced. Unless we have experienced something, it is not real.

Sometimes, the truth is so believable; people usually just believe it instead of experiencing it.

Everyone has a belief system.  These systems were formed when we were children.

Here are a few you may recognize:

·         Dad goes to work and Mum stays home to look after the kids.

·         If you’re good you go to heaven.

·         You must eat up your greens.

·         You must eat three square meals a day.

·         Love is never having to say you are sorry.

·         Hard work is good for you.

·         You will never be tall unless you stand up straight

·         You will never amount to anything unless you work hard.

 

It is probably a result of our ingrained beliefs about what a relationship should be, as opposed to the reality of the actuality of a relationship that has resulted in the high divorce rate.

When we separate what we BELIEVE from what we EXPERIENCE we will begin to run our lives, but not before.

The problem with a belief is that we take it to be the truth.  That’s fine if you imprint a belief in your mind that you will achieve, you can do it, you will attain success….but we have thousands of other beliefs that do not serve us.  Those ‘other’ beliefs are detrimental and if we take THEM to be the truth we could get stuck in them.

In other words most of us persist in thinking and doing what we learnt long ago, rather than acting out of our experience in response to whatever is happening now.

A classic story illustrates this point:

A man watches his wife cutting an inch off the end of the Lamb bone before putting it in the oven to roast.  After watching her do this a few times before, her husband asks her why.  She tells him that her mother always did it that way.  A few weeks later the husband asks his Mother-In-Law why she cuts an inch off the end of the lamb bone.  She tells him, “My mother always did it that way.”  The Grandmother is very old, in her 90’s, and when the husband and wife visit her one day he asks her the same question. “Your granddaughter, and your daughter, cut an inch off the end of the lamb bone before they put the lamb in the oven. They do it because you always did. Why did you do that?”

The old lady looks at the husband and says, “Well, in those days, I had a very small oven and the leg of lamb wouldn’t fit unless I cut an inch off the end of the bone!”

Most people are cutting an inch off the end of something in their lives to fit into an oven that’s no longer too small for it.

Most people are stuck in a melodramatic soap opera of their lives with the same four or five problems they have always had.  The bigger problem is that they continue with beliefs that have been carved into their minds since childhood and they are the reason they keep repeating the behaviour.

Here is a frightening example:

You trip over when you are five years old and cut your knee and your mother says, 'Don't cry; crying is bad," so you don't cry.  Then you have a fall while skiing when you are 17 and you break your leg but you keep a stiff upper lip and you don't cry because crying is bad.  Then when you are 24 you break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, and you really thought that they were 'the one' and you STILL don't cry.

The more you repress your feelings the more your consciousness shuts down.  You become barely alive.  You act like a zombie.  You function mechanically and get a reputation as 'a bit of a cold fish'.

 

The reality is that as you function mechanically more and more, in some cases, you become successful at it.  Here's a reality check: Mechanical success is not any more satisfying than failure.

 

I took my psychology training years ago and therapy has always been concerned with the way people are run, or how they function, by what was rather than what is and how to free people from their past.  That never sat comfortably with me.  I know hundreds of people who trained just like me and never questioned it. 

 

There are 2 reasons they didn't question it:

1. FEAR! As in: 'Don't make waves....if you question it they will flunk you.'

and

2. Cut the end of the bone off the Leg of Lamb! 

 

What do I mean by that?  Think about it.  

 

That's right:  It has ALWAYS been done that way, so there must be a good reason for it.

How does HPT (Human Potential Transformation) differ from Therapy?  Therapy is concerned with curing people of an 'illness' whereas HPT offers people an experience of themselves, and the ability to design a future.

 

It is evident from my travels and studies, and from the Transformational Change work I have done in the last two years which, I admit, has become more extreme and direct, that Belief Systems are, by and large, a myth.

 

Belief Systems are created by knowledge or data without experience.

 

If you experience something, it is real for you.

If you communicate it to somebody, it is real for them because you are expressing your experience.

If they tell it to someone else, it's a lie.  It is merely a belief without the component of experience.

 

A belief is a very powerful thing.  You can kill or you can cure with one.  I have earned my living for many years training people to believe in themselves, which is good.  You CAN believe in yourself because you have the experience of yourself, you are your own reality.  I can prove to you, from my beliefs, that what I think and see is true.

 

I ask people what they expect to get out of the training program and the list can be very diverse. Some say they want to get to know themselves, some say they want to make better decisions, have more self confidence, be more decisive, fall in love, be more open, sell more product, be a better leader or manager....

 

What they ALL have in common is a set of expectations!

 

They truly believe that their happiness is dependant on more love, money, power, sex, self confidence, etc.  Each has a belief system that relates satisfaction to something they are striving for.

 

The REALITY is that their happiness is a function of accepting what is, and make it separate from what was and what is to come.

 

Belief is a structure which can contain very little information in terms of making it useful in your consciousness or well-being.

 

HPT works on Observation and not Belief.  Observation has nothing to do with the senses, perceptions or belief systems. It only deals with direct experience...REALITY.

 

One of the core HPT Observations is that Life can be considered to be three foot long, and the first two feet eleven inches are about the material aspects of life (food,clothing and shelter) and what's known as 'psychological needs'. You need someone to love you and someone you can love back. You need self esteem, recognition and respect from others.

 

After people fill their needs they start to look what it MEANS to fill their needs.  They start to realize that there is no true satisfaction in just filling your needs and they look beyond that.  And THAT is the last inch.  THAT is what HPT is all about.

 

It is the last inch, that has been cut off the bone again and again.  That Inch is the life changer. 

That last inch is where we discover TRANSFORMATION.

Dynamic-Transformation / Building Your Future

Dynamic-Transformation is a different thing entirely from change.  It doesn't take the past and change it, add to it or re-organise it.  It creates a new context.  Possibilities that didn't exist now come into being.  The future is built on possibility.  The future is constant. 

If we carry our past with us into the future, we are limiting the amount of space we have in our future because it is taken up with the past we bring into it.  If what we have in our future is our past, our future is going to be consistent with what we had in our past.

If we can take the past OUT of our future, we create an empty space which we can fill with all manner of possibilities and opportunities that are not governed or linked to any past activity. If you do not empty out your past from your future right now then all you are doing is changing your past.

Childhood experiences that have been traumatic.  It can be one experience that was big enough to be traumatic, or a series of experiences.

An example would be: If you have been bullied at school, it's probably not the one time but more likely a period of bullying over time.  That begins to shape who you are, and who you need to be, to become, to survive.  You can't do much at the time about that but you have to do something to defend yourself.  And that leads you into continuing to be that person who has built up defence mechanisms to deal with bullying but at some point you have to find a way to take that past OUT of your future and put it back IN the past.

We all have excess baggage.  We carry it around in our heads.  It's there even when we don't see it.
We are concerned about excess baggage when we go on vacation.  We don't want it then, so we weigh our bags to make sure we are below the requirement.  Trouble is, we carry it around at all other times.

At any given moment of any given day, we reference the excess baggage for information.  Even worse than that, we carry it into our future.  We expect to be able to function and plan and build strategies for a brighter future when we carry our past around with us.

I am not talking about forgetting your past, or where you come from, or your history, or the people in it...

I am talking about today being the day when you stop paying for your bags of excess baggage, and go forward with your hands open to grasp the opportunities that will come your way.

You CANNOT grab opportunity if your hands are full!!

We human beings don't leave the past in the past.  We have the past in the future. When you do that it appears as if the past gives you who you are, and who you are in the present.

Lets imagine the past and the future as two filing cabinets.

If you take the past out of the filing cabinet marked FUTURE, and put it in the filing cabinet marked PAST, what have you got in the FUTURE?  NOTHING!  Which is wonderful. Fantastic!!!!

Why?

Because if, WHO I AM in the present, is determined by the future into which I am living, I can CREATE a future for myself that gives me, in the present, a life of being, joy, happiness, accomplishment...a life worth living.

I will be launching the Dynamic-Transformation Seminar dates soon....and at the seminar you will discover just HOW to empty that future filing cabinet, HOW to take the past out of your future and HOW to free up the potential for your future self.

Undercover Boss Vs Visible Leader

Whether it is a failing of mine or not, I had never seen a program called 'Undercover Boss' before. I had heard of it, but had never sat thru an episode to see what it was all about.

To be quite frank, I thought it was about the head of a company going to look at OTHER companies, the competition, to see what they were doing. That may sound ludicrous to many people reading this but in Sales, that happens. Maybe not the Boss but certainly sometimes you get someone come along answering an advertisement for staff and you take them on, train them up, give them all manner of resources like pitches and details about the company, even so far as giving them access to databases and then, one day...they are gone! They never show up again. They don't write, call or send flowers. It was a scouting trip. A reconnaissance mission for information.  It happens and is an occupational hazard.

I heard a story once of someone who had done just that.  They had arrived at an advertising company in London and had told them they had experience so their training was minimal. This was a spy from another ad agency.  They got a desk and a phone.  They started work.  During the first few days they got all the paperwork and all the information. In fact, they stayed there for two weeks because they had made a few sales and the company paid weekly by check, which the salespeople took to the companies bank and cashed them by arrangement..  On the Friday, once they had cashed their check, they decided to bail out.  They had taken paperwork home the night before and had everything on a memory stick.  They gave some excuse about going to Starbucks to get a coffee.  Suddenly, EVERYONE in the sales room wanted coffee. The order ended up as 9 cappuccino, 6 Latte, 5 Americano.  So another guy went with the spy to Starbucks.  Naturally, everyone paid up first.  Average coffee price in the UK: £2.50/ £3.00.  Many of the salespeople handed over a £5 note and expected change when they got back.  The two guys, the Spy and his helper, went to Starbucks with over £80 in cash.

Naturally, when they got to Starbucks the Spy gave the helper the paper with the order on it and went to the mensroom.  Never to be seen again.  He got the paperwork, the information, he got paid in cash and he got an £80 tip in cash.  The salespeople are STILL waiting for their coffee.

So with that in mind, going undercover, calling up other companies for information, sending an agent behind enemy lines, it all happens in the UK.

I was amazed at 'Undercover Boss' because this is the head of a company, and I admit that some of them are quite large, going undercover in their OWN company.

I can't believe that they could, even with make up and a disguise. pull this off.  What struck me more than that was this....

Why would you need to go 'undercover' in your own company to find out who, what, where, when and why about your business?

When I was the Sales Manager and the National Sales Trainer for Cable London/ Telewest/ Comcast I was never in my office.  I went out and saw people, I pitched up in offices and found a desk and a phone and worked there.  I got a feel for everything.  I was approached all the time, I was known, I was visible.

I couldn't have gone 'Undercover' no matter WHAT the disguise. 

The reason?  I think the clue is in the title.  Undercover BOSS!

Leaders cannot work undercover.  They can't function undercover.  Leaders lead alongside their people. 

Bosses are unknown and faceless.

Leaders are obvious, and recognizable.  That's why people follow Leaders, they recognize them.

Autopilot Responses...

So many people walk around on Autopilot. So many people have an Autopilot response to questions or situations.

In the Seduction Community, STILL headed by it's creator Ross Jeffries, one of the main tenets is, 'Never take a first response as written in stone. It's just an autopilot response and it is also something to play with.'

It's just a response that emanates from where that person is right now.'

What do you say to a Big Issue seller?
What do you say to Jehovahs Witnesses?
What do you say to a clipboard carrying student grinning maniacally at you in a shopping center?

What do you say to yourself in day to day situations?

How many times have you pitched a product or service only to hear, 'we are not interested!' That's just a weak, pointless, gutless, cop-out of an autopilot response.

All objections are state related.
Some of the state related objections are autopilot responses.

If you want examples of Autopilot responses ask for a regular size quarter pounder meal in McDonalds and you will be asked. 'Is that a large meal?'

Ask for a portion of fries and you will be asked, 'Do you want fries with that?'

I had builders working in my home and deciding to buy the 6 of them lunch, and being a very classy kind of guy, I drove to McDonalds. Remember this...
1.It was empty.
2.The car park was empty.
3. Two staff behind the counter watched me get out of the MooreMobile and walk in alone.

"Hi, can I have three quarter pounder with cheese meals, all with Cokes. Two Big-Mac meals with Fanta orange and a Chicken Sandwich meal with a Lemonade. Also can I have 6 Apple Pies please."

And then auto pilot took over and the girl asked, "Is that to eat here?"

I considered a barrage of answers but settled for, "Do you REALLY think that would be possible for me?"

Coming to her senses she shook her head and laughed.

It's dangerous to think that sometimes people are walking around on this Autopilot setting. Worse, are the ones who are driving!

How many times have you driven somewhere and not remembered the journey?
How many times have you driven your usual route to work only to realise that THAT was the day you were going somewhere else on the way to work first?

If you catch yourself responding to something in the same way you have always done, think for a second. What would happen IF you did something different?

The lights may be on but...is anyone at home in your head?

Disengage it!

Emotional Intelligence

I am about to turn this EQ and IQ debate on its head!

What really is EQ, IQ and IC?

Your EQ is more important than your IQ. The IQ test may help you get a job but your EQ will help you keep it. A high IQ is around 135. A high EQ is immeasurable.

It is no surprise that there are many people with really high IQ’s working for people with really low IQ’s. The people with the low IQ also have a high EQ, Emotional Quotient, and this makes them the real leaders. They know how to get people to work together.  They know how to put teams, groups and companies together.  They get people to work with people

The high EQ people know how the whole game is played and they draw the best out of their people and they are not afraid to have the more ‘intelligent’ working for them.

Of course, the people with the high IQ know how long it takes two men to fill up a bath with water using a pint glass halfway up a mountain in a thunderstorm but...that’s not going to improve business is it?

What would improve business?

Being the person who has the EQ skills to get the two guys to fill a bath with water halfway up a mountain in a thunderstorm in the first place!

Now although that is a great description of what EQ and IQ is (even if I say so myself ;-)) there is another definition of EQ, IQ and IC ("IC? What's THAT?" I hear you ask). What's more...it's probably the most important and life changing definition there is.

What if you are working at a company and things are not going your way. Or you may be doing something in your life but you just can't get it right. You can't achieve what you want to achieve. Do you give up? Do you continue to 'try' (yuck! I hate that word) but in your mind and heart you know that you have given up?

This is the new IQ in the world today. So many people IQ (I Quit). What's more, they have no idea how near to success they are when they quit!

Are you the only person in your company, business, life, relationship that thinks IQ? I bet not. You see, it's contagious!

Like a virus it infects everyone until, before you know it, unconsciously, EQ (Everyone Quits!).

Commit to one thing, if you commit to nothing else, commit to this...

IC! This is the belief you need. Your IQ and your EQ is blown away by this.

IC = I Can!

Your IC level (I CAN) is always more important than the IQ (I QUIT)level and will stop the rot of EQ (Everyone Quits) in its tracks. Defeat will never be an option. So when logic is trying to point out all the excuses and reasons tell that little voice in your head that keeps telling you that you will fail, you will not succeed and you are useless to shut the hell up.

Say to yourself: My IC is unbeatable. IC. I CAN!

Dan Forbes has added ANOTHER alternative: IW for I WILL.  This is Determination. As Dan says, "All the smarts in the world, and all the hopes in the world will not accomplish what someone with sheer determination will".

As for the words you use, I prefer IM = I MUST! When you see things as a 'I MUST' then you become UNSTOPPABLE!

 Check out Bad vs Strong language here: Bad Vs Strong Language