Reality or Construct? You Decide.

WHAT REALM DO YOU WORK OUT OF?

When something totally unexpected happens in our life, one normally wonders or asks: "how do I deal with it?"

A better question would be, "When I deal with situations like that, what Realm do I work out of?"

Consider: There are two different realms that human beings work from inside of.
A 'Reality' realm called 'What happened' and an imaginary realm called 'Story/Interpretation'.

The 'What happened' realm is Reality.  The facts. If you were a fly on the wall you would be able to see exactly what happened.  You would see the facts, you would know exactly what caused something, the content of conversations, the incidents...everything.

Then there is another realm totally unique to human beings because of language and imagination.  It is the interpretation of what may have happened.  A construction by our imagination that builds something totally incorrect.  A story we make up.

All of the interpretation or story you make up is is extremely powerful, and can even be useful as a tool for improving and expanding your mind through creativity as long as you remember that the story you make up, or your interpretation, is not the truth.

Ongoing, we link what happened to the story we create about what happened and we make them one and the same.

The only thing that really happens is the fact.  Let's look at a situation involving you.

Situation: He/ She didn't call me. Could be a client, could be a potential customer, could be someone you met and gave your phone number to...
Story: He/ She didn't like me, they were messing me about, I am not good enough for them, they lied to me, they found a better deal somewhere else, they have been injured and can't get to a phone...

The only thing that really happened was the...
Fact: They lost your number or are just busy and will call you soon, but there really is NO Problem.

Everything other than the fact is a story not based on anything real.
But, who created the story?  You did.

If you believe the story rather than what Really Happened then you will reinforce the fact with the story and you are locked in a vicious circle, over and over again.

If you can recognize that what you are concentrating on is a story you created and not the reality, what could you live like?  What could be possible for you?

Onassis and Me

The Aristotle Onassis Model

In 1970 Aristotle Onassis was relaxing in the bar of the London Palladium during a performance. The variety show on stage held no interest for him, he was most likely with Jackie and some friends and he had removed himself from the audience and was now enjoying his customary Johnnie Walker Black Label. 

At the Interval the audience started to fill the bar and a man and woman walked in with their 8 year old son. Onassis looked at the boy, who was wearing a suit and a tie, and smiled, walked over to the couple and said in his gruff voice something along the lines of, 'You have the smartest young man I have seen in a long while'. He then patted the boy on the head and gave him a five pound note. Then, with a smile, a slight nod and a wave he walked off to meet his party of guests. People looked at the couple with their son and the man said to his wife, 'You know who that was don't you?'

£5 was a LOT of money in 1970. The evening out for the couple and their son had been something the man had been saving up for for two months. The suit the boy was wearing (a blue two tone single breasted) came from the Peter Pan Outfitters for children in the Commercial Road in East London. The couple were my Mum and Dad. If ONLY I had kept that five pound note!

Ever since that moment I have been interested in the life of Aristotle Onassis.

Aristotle Onassis was one of the most successful, publicized and examined people in the world during the middle of the 20th century. Today, 37 years after his death, he is principally remembered as an ultra-rich shipping magnate, touring the world on his magnificent yacht and for his romance with the diva soprano Maria Callas and marriage to Jacqueline Kennedy. Before he attained business and social heights, however, he was a very rough, uncultured, non-work of art. His effort to change a dim future is worth a look: and is instructional as a teaching aid that anyone can utilize in pursuit of success.

Onassis was born in Smyrna of Greek parents. At the end of World War I he, along with millions of others, was forced into refugee status and arrived in Argentina as a penniless immigrant. His Spanish was minimal, his education limited and his skills on offer were not highly prized. Nevertheless, he examined his circumstance realistically and with deep analysis. He recognized that out of post-war chaos would come opportunity for the agile and creative entrepreneur. Being broke was just an obstacle, not a closed, door to Onassis.

As Onassis learnt the ways of Argentine society and business he noticed that there were specific clubs, restaurants, hotels and theatres that were almost exclusively frequented by the successful business and political class. Always a keen observer of human nature, he realized that contacts and friendships of value to an ambitious fellow like himself could only be nurtured in this rarefied realm. Onassis was determined to find a way in.

 

He worked mundane jobs, including a stint as a telephone operator. However, he was different from co-workers and other immigrants. He immersed himself in all things Argentine and he saved every cent he earned that was not needed for basic sustenance. Most importantly, he recognized the old saying; “the rich are different from you and me” was so true. He needed to emulate the rich in order to become rich. He never looked at successful people as the enemy. He had aspirations, not jealousy in his heart.

Onassis became addicted to quality in all areas of life. While still poor, he saved every peso until he could afford a Saville Row hand cut suit. He only had one suit, but it was elegant. He also observed that the rich seemed to appear healthier, happier. They seemed to sport suntan skin as a badge of their fortunate lifestyle. Onassis developed a lifetime addiction to pursuit of the perfect suntan. His tan was internationally famous long before the actor George Hamilton gained similar fame. To this day, a suntan is an emblem of the good life for the successful class.

A Saville Row suit, quality personal furnishings and a suntan that reeked of idle leisure and success were only a start. Onassis was still a rough diamond. Nevertheless, he believed in his ultimate destiny. He would have a drink every night at the bar of the Intercontinental Hotel in Buenos Aires, the cities finest. Only one drink, because that was all he could afford. He still worked as a telephone operator, but he kept his parallel lives as a blue-collar worker and social status seeker firmly differentiated.

His nightly visits to the Intercontinental Hotel bar gradually lead to his building a network of business and social contacts. The famous Argentine soprano Claudia Musa frequently visited the hotel. She was an adored opera star and a cultured beauty. Onassis was basically a nobody and a poser. And yet, he pursued the beautiful singer, and with his usual tenacity he won her heart. This drive to win would be displayed in every area of his long and exciting life.

Onassis recognized that Argentine women preferred a type of sweet Turkish tobacco that was not widely available in South America. Utilizing his newly found relationships; he brokered an import deal for an inventory of the tobacco. He assembled the capital necessary to organize a small factory and began to market several brands of Turkish cigarettes. This small, but successful deal was the basis for his later international business prominence.

Onassis recognized that World War II was imminent. The movement of war materiel was going to become crucial to the Allies winning the war. Shipping would be highly profitable, if he could find an inventory of ships to purchase. With customary elan, he found a small fleet of sturdy but well used freighters on the St. Lawrence Waterway and arranged a tight line of credit to purchase the motley flotilla. He was on his way to becoming the most famous shipping magnate in history.

Entrepreneurs, in order to succeed, often must change elements of their personal lifestyle. We have all heard the old adage, “success breeds success”. No one practised this truism more fully and instructively than Aristotle Onassis. He bought one high quality suit. He squired beautiful women. He went to the finest clubs, even though he could not afford much more than one drink. He used his new environment, new contacts and network to benefit his single-minded pursuit of success. Why did Willy Sutton rob banks: because that was where the money was! Onassis also made the elemental decision to hang out where the money was.

One of the most difficult aspects of the entrepreneurial process that must be overcome is the need to adjust lifestyle. Sacrifice today will pay dividends tomorrow. Venture capital usually will not be found in a pool hall. The necessity to improve one’s self-presentation and to network continually is paramount. You must be constantly closing the sale, improving your skills and totally focus on achieving your goal.

Aristotle Onassis worked blue-collar jobs, spoke Spanish as a third language, was a displaced immigrant on a strange continent and had zero personal assets. Nevertheless, he organized a personal plan to overcome his obstacles and lead a life of legendary accomplishment.

I spend a great deal of time training and coaching people and corporations to overcome hurdles. Some easily recognize the need to change habits and to utilize pieces of the Onassis template. They often have the ability to succeed. Many more unfortunately, decide that they know best, markets will adapt to their wants and a shortcut to success can be taken. They always fail. This is an absolute observation.

At the harbour of Nidri is a statue of the man who has inspired me and, through my work, inspires others. You can also see Skorpios from there. There is no way I can visit his grave as he is entombed with his two children on the private island but the statue is the nearest I can get to 'The Great Onassis' again in person.










Quotes:

“To be successful, keep looking tanned, live in an elegant building (even if you're in the cellar), be seen in smart restaurants (even if you only nurse one drink) and if you borrow, borrow big.”

“If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.”

“It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.”

“We must free ourselves of the hope that the sea will ever rest. We must learn to sail in high winds.”

“The secret of business is to know something nobody else knows”

“After a certain point, money is meaningless. It ceases to be the goal. The game is what counts.”

“I have no friends and no enemies -- only competitors.”

“Get a sun lamp to keep you looking as if you have just come back from somewhere expensive”

“Find a priest who understands English and doesn't look like Rasputin.”

“The more you own, the more you know you don't own.”

“Always carry a notebook. Write down ideas and information. Write down everything you know and hear about a person you meet. That way, next time you meet them, you know how much time to give them.”

You Need To Be Seen As A Leader

Many people are surprised to discover that being a Manager is markedly different from being a Leader.

A Leader is someone who can do ALL of the Managerial stuff but they have other attributes that put them head and shoulders above the others.

To be a leader means empowering people, taking risks, to be at the FOREFRONT, to be an example, to be a stabilizing force both emotionally and business wise during tough times, to be the one who rouses and stirs the emotions in people.

To be a leader means saying 'US' rather than 'ME', saying 'WE did it' and not 'I did it' and saying 'LET'S do it' rather than 'YOU do it'.

If you get it right, you don't even have to ask people to do something.  They become so part of your empowered environment that they know what needs doing and they do it, because they know YOU would.

Non verbal Leadership just means 'being there' for your employees.

In World War II Winston Churchill rallied the British people and their resolve by leading by example.  He was seen walking around and talking to the people where the heaviest damage from the bombing had been.  He inspired millions of people by being seen where the rockets and bombs had landed.

Dwight Eisenhower was always accessible to his men of all ranks and was there with the troops before the launch of the invasion of Europe.

What these people like Churchill, Eisenhower, MacArthur, Margaret Thatcher were saying was very powerful but equally important, or in some cases more, was what they were doing.

Being visible at the front, being shoulder to shoulder with their troops inspired nations. 

The definition of Leadership implies that you must be at the front, and be seen to be at the front.  If not, who are you?

The greatest Generals like Marcus Aurelius, Alexander and others did not give orders from the rear (like their opponents or 'competition') but they led their men into battle.

If you want to be a leader, be visible.  Walk the office, walk the floor, talk to your people and your customers however large your organisation.  Get out of that office and be seen.

REMEMBER: People will not follow you if you lead them in the wrong direction.  Nor will they follow you if you lead them in the right direction, but in the wrong way.

If you want to lead them right, you have to be a leader!

Do something SCARY!!!

As the season changes and we venture into autumn the nights draw in earlier each evening.  We are in the run up to Hallowe'en and this time of year always has that sense of the unknown about it.  We start to think of Hallowe'en and the trick or treaters, ghosts, spirits....and in some cases...FEAR.

What do you fear?  What scares you?

Is it that call to a nightmare client?
Is it that dental appointment?
Is it that meeting with your boss about your performance (or lack of)?
Is it the flight that you have to take?
Is it getting in that elevator?
Is it........

Well, whatever it is, it's personal to you.

But, do you know what?

That thing you fear, that challenge you have, that one thing you are DREADING doing...

...you need to do it right now, and get it out of the way.

Step outside that comfort circle and do something scary, risky, out of the ordinary tomorrow.  Then do something like that every day!  then watch as your confidence grows.

You MUST have seen the first Alien movie where the alien bursts out of Cains chest at the dining table on board the Nostromo.

I always think of how different it would have been if I had been on that spaceship. Just as the little alien runs across the table I would have smashed it with a sledge hammer and flattened it. Then, I would have said a line that would have probably been a classic:

“If we had let that out of the room it would have killed everyone!”

Roll credits! Shortest movie in history but...

If you Kill the Monster Early then you save a lot of time and effort.

The Difference that MAKES The Difference

What's the Difference that MAKES the Difference?

To me it's got to be attitude. That self assuredness, that energy, that belief that no matter what happens, no matter what obstacles appear, you will achieve what you want to achieve.

People always look for cop outs. Excuses. They have a but!

"I could have done that...BUT!"
"I would have done that...BUT!"
"I should have done that...BUT!"

That's the old 'coulda, woulda, shoulda' scenario. At the heart of that scenario is another word. 'Didna'.

I know that if you have the right attitude you can achieve anything.

I use myself as an example.

• I have an air of uninsultability. I don't care what people say about me. Why should I? They don't know what they are talking about! They must get my name right though!
• I decide where my energy goes, nobody else.
• Everything people say or do to me is energy, and it's just a toy for me to play with.
• I don't take anything that people say to me at first to be written in stone. In other words, what people say first can be changed.
• Nothing in life has any meaning except the meaning I give it.
• I never hate people who are obviously jealous of me. I respect their jealousy because they must think I am better than them or they want to be me!
• 90% of people are running on autopilot 90% of the time
• If I am told something can't be done it's because the person telling me doesn't know how to do it. So I go and do it.

It is also important to think different. A case in point.

I had a conversation the other day regarding work. Someone was looking for a change of career. It seemed that working from home might be better than going out to work. I made a quick suggestion.

"What about some form of MLM? Multi Level Marketing is booming. You could get on the vitamin and herbal remedy market. There are a lot of companies looking for people to sell products and you could have vitamin evenings and sell the products at home to people who come around for the evening party?"

What was the response...? Well...objection.....?

Before I tell you the response/ objection let me reframe it....

Throughout my career I have advised people on what to do for a business venture, in what to sell, and how to sell. In all of those areas I get the same response as I got here. The same! What amazes me is how the same reply from me always makes them realises what a stupid, dumbass objection it is...

The response/ objection?...

"Do you know how many companies there are out there selling that?"

Duh! Yes I do. Maybe not to the exact figure but I can hazard a guess...

My reply?

"Do you know how many people there are out there buying that stuff?"

Simple. There are millions of people out there. BILLIONS of people in the world. Are you telling me that they are ALL buying from these companies. No. They are not.

Advertising either works or it doesn't. If it didn't work then people wouldn't advertise.

I had someone tell me once, 'I don't advertise because I know it won't work!' 
I told them, 'You know when you will realise that it does?  In a years time when you place an advertisement that says 'Business for Sale', THAT is when you will realise advertising works!'

We all know Louis Vuitton, Bentley, Rolls Royce, Rolex, Breitling and all manner of stuff that we desire and /or buy. Why do they advertise? Why do they HAVE to advertise? Because it works.

Then I got this...

"If people want things like that then they would just go down to the supermaket and buy them."

No WAY!  People have to be TOLD what to buy. They have to be given options.

That's why you sell someone a years supply rather than a months.

What's more, selling things on the internet or at home is designed to undercut the big stores as well as the small exclusive ones. These MLM companies market stuff that you cannot buy in stores. The opportunity is there!

It's a matter of doing things Differently. Thinking Differently. Selling Differently. Being Different. And that's the difference that MAKES the difference!

If you let NOTHING get in the way of your target, nothing get in the way of your dream and nothing get in the way of achieving what you want then nothing will.

You have to change your beliefs, change your attitude and change your mind set.

You must not let anything get in your way.

Here's an example...This is someone who never let anything get in their way, never let anything stop them, adapted situations to suit and changed themselves...they know the meaning of the difference that makes the difference.

The man is Chaim Weitz.

Though he is from a Hungarian family he was born in Isreal and his Mother took him, at the age of 8, to live in America even though he was unable to speak English.

When older he made money selling comic books at conventions. He learnt to speak English, German and Hebrew as well as his native Hungarian and taught in schools in America under the name Gene Klein.

A few years later he picked up a guitar, changed his name to Gene Simmons and morphed into the guy in the pic at the top of this blog!

If he can achieve a personal metamorphosis like that...anything is possible. That's the Difference that MAKES the Difference!

Preventing 'Death by Powerpoint'

I have sat through many presentations in my previous life as a Sales Director at companies like Telewest, Cable London and Holiday Ownership Exchange and believe me, I feel your pain when it comes to Slides or Powerpoint presentations.

As soon as you walk into the seminar room and you see the laptop and computer your heart sinks because you KNOW that not only have you got to listen to someone, you have to read the slides and, probably, make notes.

I love French Cinema and I speak a little French so I ignore the subtitles as much as I can but many people hate the idea of reading a movie, they want to watch one. 

It's the same with presentations.  Some people have EVERYTHING they say, EVERY WORD, up on that screen and they not only read the slide out but they POINT AT THE WORDS AS THEY GO ALONG!!!

That is a combination of lack of confidence, bad presentation skills and overkill.  It is such poor preparation that it borders on Preparation H!!

When these presenters look at the audience can't they see the sea of bored people with a glazed look on their faces. (I know, I was one of them).

Steve Jobs had a list of rulles for presentations.

1.   Open with words that are in line with the theme by using a headline.
2.   Make the theme clear and consistant so it sets the direction.
3.   Provide an outline.
4.   Open and close each section with a clear transition.
5.   Sell an experience.
6.   Use powerful words like Extraordinary, amazing, cool, awesome and incredible.
7.   Make numbers and statistics meaningful and then break them down.
8.   Analogies help connect the dots.
9.   Paint a simple picture that doesn't overwhelm.
10. Rehearse it.

In order to create a PowerPoint presentation that is engaging and compelling, use this list as rocket fuel that will fire your presentation to the stars.  It's a list of do's and dont's that has been built over years of experience.  Add what works for you and let me know your own tips.

1. Clip art is funny but don't even think about using crap that a 10 year old could have come up with.  Your credibility will be shot.  Limit the clip art or better still leave it out completely

2. Add an unexpected, personal, FUNNY photograph.
3. The slide is meant to reinforce the point you are making.  NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND

4. Don't EVER say, "This one's a little hard to read." SLIDES ARE FREE. Split the slide into two.
5. Don't have your slides spin around or have moving text -It is very annoying!  I have heard salespeople in the audience next to me having side bets on which direction the slide will come in from. 
6. Don't put more than one point on a slide.
7. Count the laughs. At least one for every five slides. (If there's at least one laugh every five slides, you can count on one other thing: money.)
8. Use a white background. The fancy ones are distracting.  They are an embellishment that detracts from your message.
9. Include a logo. I put a bug-size logo in the lower right corner of every slide. I have no idea why, but no one has ever said anything to me. And I figure if it's good enough for MTV, Comedy Central or any of those Cable channels, it's good enough for me.
10. Use the font IMPACT. Set the master screen for 44pt and shadow the type.
11. Emphasize words by blowing them up a few point sizes. Make them a different colour. I use Purple.

12. If you're labouring over one slide that you are trying to "make work," delete it. It was probably a weak point.

13. Use slides that tell a story, rather than relate a fact. Stories are the most powerful part of the sale. Here's the rule: Facts and figures are forgotten, stories are remembered and retold.

14. Are your slides engaging? There are two kinds of slides: engaging and distracting. Review each slide and ask yourself, "How engaging is this slide?" If it's not engaging, then it's distracting, so why the hell are you using it?

15. Are your slides asking questions or making statements? Questions will promote conversation and engage. Statements are just that - There is no conversation.

16. How many of the claims that you makE in your sales presentation, by PowerPoint or verbally, are backed up with proof?

17. Incorporate video testimonial clips throughout your slide presentation to back up and prove that your claims are real and transferable-real, transferable, and acceptable to the customer.

By now you're probably totally disheartened about your PowerPoint presentation because I've exposed it for the powerless "point" it is. But take heart. Your competition's slide presentation is equally pathetic.

Here is the secret solution: Convert the time you're wasting by watching television reruns and use it to develop your own PowerPoint presentation that is 100 percent in terms of the customer's needs and desires. Your PowerPoint presentation should engage the prospective customer by asking questions and promoting dialogue, include a little humour to keep the sales presentation alive, and support every fact and claim with testimonials.

And by the way, there's one question that you better make certain appears toward the end of your PowerPoint presentation: a question that asks for the sale.

One of the best pieces of advice I can give you to make sure the Powerpoint presentation you are constructing is interesting is this.  When you are done, leave it for two days.  Then look at it again.  If it STILL looks great, use it.  That break will let your mind review it with fresh eyes.

 

*With thanks to Steve Jobs and Jeffrey Gitomer

You-Nique

Do you wonder what makes you different from everyone else? Are you looking for an answer to "What makes me special and unique?" that is more meaningful than just your fingerprints or a spiral of DNA?


Understanding how each of us is unique is an essential part of questioning who we are and why humanity exists. To help you find an answer to this ancient and universal question, we offer a new way of looking at things.

Are you Unique? Do you go your own way? Do you follow your own beliefs?

Being unique can make you start to feel awkward about who you are. If you are not like everybody else ... you can feel like you don't fit ... and don't belong.


And that is a horrible way to feel .. especially when you consider that everyone is unique. Everyone, underneath the things that define a generation or a culture, is truly unique and vastly different ... from the things they love -- to what inspires them or makes them laugh.


Do you remember the scene in The Life of Brian when, having been chased and followed by hundreds of people, Brian addresses the crowd from his bedroom window and there is the classic exchange...

Brian: You are all Individuals!
Lone Voice: I'm not!

Being an individual means you are unique.

Do you have any idea just how unique you are?

What makes you unique?
Is it what you do, or how you do what you do?

If you want to Stand Out, you have to be OutStanding.
It's a simple as that. And Simplicity rules.

Simplicity is harder than you think. We all have the ability to make things difficult. We analyse and go over details again and again when in fact what we should be doing is refining and streamlining.

If you want to be unique you have to strip everything down and discover just what sets you apart from everyone else.

Sustained success comes only when you take what's unique about you and figure out how to make it useful.

Whatever it is that you do to make yourself unique you have to decide whether or not it is something that will generate interest, business and raving fans (repeat customers).

What are your strengths? How do you use those strengths to overcome your competitors, if you consider your competitors?

Remember that there is no one else on this planet like you. No one else can do what you do, in the way you do it. If there were then I can guarantee that they wouldn't do what you do for the same reasons you do it.

The same thing applies to businesses and other types of organizations. But in this case, it is called branding and is known as what makes you stand apart and stand out from the crowd ... in both good and bad ways.


Being unique in business may be just what your company needs ... and should shout about. But just being different isn't what you want to focus on. Instead, you want to be distinctive -- in the things your customers and clients value most. And that is what finding your business niche is all about.

What brew do you want, Specifically?

Getting what you want in life, or a more positive outcome at least, is just like enjoying your favourite cup of Joe.

SO, there you are...thinking.  All day, thinking.  You drive to work and you are...thinking. You sit at your desk...thinking.  You drive home...thinking.

You do a lot of thinking.  We all do.  We think about good things.  We think about bad things.
Good, bad, funny, sad, pointless, important.  You name it!

When you are cruising through your day, there is a voice in your head telling you stuff, telling you what to do, telling you to do things.  Don't panic.  You're not going mad.  That's thinking.

Are you thinking good stuff or bad stuff because you need to check.  Bad stuff can make you SO depressed you are going to believe that it isn't worth even attempting something.  Why?  Because you have already predetermined that failure.

Hey, do something different.  Predetermine your success.

How many times have you worried about something, like a dental appointment, only to find that there was no pain, minimum amount of work needed, and on reflection, not a too shabby way of spending your morning?

Then again, it may have hurt, you needed root canal and it wasn't a great experience.  But think about it.  Would worrying have changed that?  Would being negative about it have changed that?  NO!

The conversations you have with yourself are the key driver to the outcome of whatever it is you are doing.

How many times have you gone into a meeting and thought, or even muttered to yourself, 'This is going to be a COMPLETE waste of time'?  Guess what?  Yeah, it was wasn't it?

'Why am I driving down here? There will be no parking spaces!'
'I won't be able to get a table at that restaurant tonight.'
'That person won't be interested in me.'

If you have ever thought like that then you are focusing on the negative.  You are focusing on what you DON'T want rather than what you DO.

Why do you do that in your head when you wouldn't dream of doing it out loud.

When you go into Starbucks and the Barista asks you what you want do you say, "Well, I don't want a Latte, and I don't want a Mocha, and a certainly don't want a Tea"?

That would be stupid right?

You ask for what you want.  "I'll have a Cappucino please."

So why don't you keep that mindset in everything? 

Be positive sounds like a bloodgroup but it's more than that.  If you believe in The Law of Attraction then can you imagine what sort of life you are going to enjoy if you continue to focus on the negative stuff?  Maybe you are already suffering that lifestyle.  Well STOP.  Right now. 

Be specific about what you want and be determined to get what you want from situations.

'I am going to enjoy this meeting and get my points across'
'I am going to park the car down here and then go to the restaurant'
'I am going to get a table at the restaurant tonight'
'I am going to have fun talking to that person'

Go for Cappucino in your life.  Be Specific!

Seminar Dates

Dates and Locatiions to be finalized by The Moore Consortium and Dynamic-Life Seminars...




Dynamic-Life Academy Inner Game and Human Potential Technology Training.......

2012
September: Brighton - Bristol - Birmingham

October: Manchester - Newcastle - Edinburgh - Glasgow

November: London - Jersey

December; Paris - London

2013
January: London - Jersey

February: Oslo - Barcelona

April: Los Angeles - New York -  Universal Orlando

Tickets and booking information coming up.....

Thanks to Derek and Jill at DLS for their organization of this.

DUCK!

A man used to walk past a jewellery store every morning and he would take out his gold watch and he would look in the window and he would set his watch. And then he‘d be on his way. This went on day after day, week after week, month after month. Every morning for a few years the jeweller saw this man doing this.

Well, one day the jeweller is out in front of the store and he is sweeping the sidewalk and the man stops, takes out his watch and sets it. And the jeweller said, “Pardon me, where do you work?” He said, “I work down at the big factory and it’s important that I have the watch set properly because I blow the whistle at noon telling everybody it’s time to go to lunch.”

The jeweller said, “Isn’t that funny? Because I have been setting that clock by that whistle every day at noon.”
                                    _____________________

If it Looks like a Duck, Quacks like a Duck and Walks like a Duck then it has to be a Duck, right?

Not from what I see, not every time anyway...

I run a lot of seminars. Law of Attraction, Persuasion, Sales Training, Inner Game, NLP, Motivation, State Management, Attitudinal Training, Firewalking, Glasswalking....It's a big list.

I have sat in on a lot of personal development seminars run by other 'trainers' in my time. I have even gone undercover at a few just to see what some people are actually saying and doing in front of groups of people, otherwise known as paying Clients/ Customers/ Delegates.

I have also kept a low profile at some Firewalking events up and down the country and I am amazed at what I hear sometimes. Old, out of date, training exercises being rolled out again and again, either through inexperience, lack of training or just plain old laziness. On occasion I have actually feared for the safety of the public on some of these events. I saw an Arrow Bend once which could have ended up on the ten o'clock news.

Some are re-hashing old out of date exercises, or its the new 'expert' that has either read a book or read someone else's notes or even just took a company over or inherited it and decided they know what they are doing.

Some of the messages conveyed to the audiences leave a lot to be desired.

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing. That's for sure.

A terrific book has been published about the Self Help movement and I recommend you read it. It is called SHAM and it's available from Amazon (isn't everything?) This really is a book to make you think, even if you are in the profession. It makes you realise what is going on around you, what some people are up to and also, how easy it is to be tarred by the same brush JUST by association.

The challenge you have is 'how do you know the person you are listening to, or the person training you, is the right one to follow.

Are you following the right person? Do they know what they are talking about? Where do they get their information from? How old is it? Does it work?

When I was at college the craze was (and still is if you look at the dumbing down of examinations) to not buy new text books but to read the textbooks others had used and read the writing, the notes made in pen in the margins, and check out the underlined passages. I couldn't figure that one out. The person who had the book before you could have been a mad man!!!

There is a lot that is lost in translation. Things get diluted, distilled and the original message can be lost.

Always check to see what your teachers history is, who they know, who they have worked with.

You see, once you start questioning you realise that sometimes, if it Walks like a Duck, Quacks like a Duck and Looks like a Duck...it could be a cartoon duck and NOT the real thing!

In other words...Not what it is Quacked up to be!

One other thing. There is a Phobia that is very relevant in the Self Help or Personal Development arena. The Phobia is Anatidaephobia ...It is the Fear that somewhere in the world there is a Duck watching you.....There are a lot of ducks in this business. I know who they are and I know they are watching me....Once on a plane I saw this.... 

QUACK!

Chasing Your Dream

I watched a dog yesterday.

It was sitting on the side of the road when a car drove past.

The dog was obviously bored and looking for something to do, waiting for something to come along, when along came an Alfa Romeo.

It drove past the dog, the dog looked at the car, then chased it.  It didn't have to chase the car for long as it stopped only a few hundred yards along the lane. 

I watched the dog.  It stopped when the car stopped and then, after giving the car a quick glance, walked back to where it had been sitting, sat down, and carried on staring across the fields.

Chasing that car seemed like a good idea at the time but the dog had overlooked one vital piece of the equation. 

It had no idea what to do with the car when it caught it!
                                               ____________________

What are you like when an opportunity comes your way? 

There you are, minding your own business, or dreaming about running your own business, when....BANG!

No, you haven't been hit by a car.  You have been waiting for something to come along and now you have seen a car appear on the horizon, like an idea or an opportunity.  Then it gets nearer and you start to look at it.  Then you get intrigued by it.  Then you chase your dream.  The car is off down the road and you are chasing it.

But when you catch the car, or the idea, what are you gonna do with it?  Are you going to get in the driving seat and drive it?

Where to?

Dogs chase cars with no idea what they are going to do with them when they catch them.
Conversely, Cats don't chase cars.  They look at the car going by and probably think 'Hmmm, nice car, Alfa Romeo' and carry on relaxing.  They just can't be bothered to seize opportunity.

Don't be a dog and chase things for no reason.  Don't be a cat either, and let opportunity go by.

Be someone who has the end in sight.  Know your destination.  Know your direction, plan your route, know why you are taking the journey and then, when an opportunity comes your way, chase it, get in the driving seat and hit the accelerator!

You-Nique

Do you wonder what makes you different from everyone else? Are you looking for an answer to "What makes me special and unique?" that is more meaningful than just your fingerprints or a spiral of DNA?


Understanding how each of us is unique is an essential part of questioning who we are and why humanity exists. To help you find an answer to this ancient and universal question, we offer a new way of looking at things.

Are you Unique?  Do you go your own way?  Do you follow your own beliefs?

Being unique can make you start to feel awkward about who you are. If you are not like everybody else ... you can feel like you don't fit ... and don't belong.


And that is a horrible way to feel .. especially when you consider that everyone is unique. Everyone, underneath the things that define a generation or a culture, is truly unique and vastly different ... from the things they love -- to what inspires them or makes them laugh.


Do you remember the scene in The Life of Brian when, having been chased and followed by hundreds of people, Brian addresses the crowd from his bedroom window and there is the classic exchange...

Brian: You are all Individuals!
Lone Voice: I'm not!

Being an individual means you are unique.

Do you have any idea just how unique you are?

What makes you unique?
Is it what you do, or how you do what you do?

If you want to Stand Out, you have to be OutStanding. 
It's a simple as that. And Simplicity rules.

Simplicity is harder than you think.  We all have the ability to make things difficult.  We analyse and go over details again and again when in fact what we should be doing is refining and streamlining.

If you want to be unique you have to strip everything down and discover just what sets you apart from everyone else.

Sustained success comes only when you take what's unique about you and figure out how to make it useful.

Whatever it is that you do to make yourself unique you have to decide whether or not it is something that will generate interest, business and raving fans (repeat customers).

What are your strengths?  How do you use those strengths to overcome your competitors, if you consider your competitors?

Remember that there is no one else on this planet like you.  No one else can do what you do, in the way you do it.  If there were then I can guarantee that they wouldn't do what you do for the same reasons you do it.

The same thing applies to businesses and other types of organizations. But in this case, it is called branding and is known as what makes you stand apart and stand out from the crowd ... in both good and bad ways.


Being unique in business may be just what your company needs ... and should shout about. But just being different isn't what you want to focus on. Instead, you want to be distinctive -- in the things your customers and clients value most. And that is what finding your business niche is all about.

That way, you begin to build loyalty to what makes you different ... like Classic Coke or Starbucks' coffeehouse experience that harkens back to Lloyds of London and the bankers that backed the shipping trade.


How To Make Your Business Unique


1. Largest Selection
One way that you can make your product or service stand out is to offer the largest selection of products, services or programs.
Example: Home Depot, E-Bay, Staples, Amazon.co.uk

2. Innovative Product
If you have a new product or a service that others don’t offer, you will have something that no one else can offer.
Example: Windows, Viagra, Value Program

3. Multiple Uses
Once you have a product or service to offer, look for other ways that the customer can use the same product or service.
Example: Baby carrier that has carriage base, electric can opener with knife sharpener, Aspirin can be used as pain reliever and heart attack preventative. Cell phone is a camera too.

4. Superior Customer Service
Keep reminding your customer that you are eager to help them by giving extra-ordinary support on your product or service.
Example: Nordstrom's is known for this. Doctors who make house calls, a mobile lawyer's office, a glass company that comes to your workplace to change the glass in your automobile are other examples.

5. Convenient Location
Make it easy for customers to do business with you by providing them access in exactly the place where they will need your product or service.
Example: Bank in the supermarket, ATM in airport, setting up a stand to sell umbrellas on a busy street corner on a rainy day.

6. Expert Consulting
If you have deep knowledge of your product or service, you can be useful in helping your customers before and after the sale is made.
Example: Computer sales person who understands connectivity issues and can help you integrate your equipment with the new computer. Estate Agent who has huge rolodex and provides referral to other vendors that new home owner would need.

7. Price
If you have a product or service with a high price, you offer prestige. If you offer the lowest price, the thrifty customer will be attracted to your product or service.
Example: High Price - Lexus, Canyon Ranch etc. Low price - Target, Wal-Mart

8. Lasting affect
The product or service you offer have a longer lasting affect than any others.
Example - Extra strength Tylenol, Bike lock that cannot be opened, car battery that lasts 5 years, long lasting car tires.

9. Guarantee
Offer a guarantee with your product or service.
Example: Money back if not satisfied. Free conversion back to previous vendor if not satisfied.

10. Packaging
Offer a package that is different from others. (prettier, stronger, environmentally friendly, easier to open, child-proof)
Example: Packaging material that dissolves in water, free gift wrapping for all purchases, child-proof aspirin bottles, juice drinks with straw.

Plan the End

A great ending in a movie is Everything.  No point in building up to a crescendo and then fizzle out to nothing.  In life, there has to be a great ending too.

The ending is everything.

Plan it, consider all of the possibilities and permutations, all of the factors that could take the glory away from you and give the kudos to someone else.

Think far ahead and you will know when to stop.

When you have the vision and the intelligence to look ahead on your timeline and you plan your moves you will stick to the plan and not be tempted to improvise.

Get rid of anxiety and vagueness because these two weaknesses are the reason so many people fail to conclude ther actions successfully.

If you see the ending you will not deviate from it.

Target The Source

In your life, be it business or private, you will come up against trouble.  The Dynamic-Life Academy shows you how to deal with individuals, agitators, who set out to poison your life.

There is a saying that you should remember and hold dear.  It's memory will serve you well.

"Shoot the Shepherd and the Sheep will Scatter". The Shepherd is a metaphor for your enemy, your agitator.  The sheep are a metaphor for your agitators followers, believers, team.

You have to do this early.  You must have seen the Alien films. They are great and I always get a kick out of watching them. Do you remember that scene in the first film when Cain (John Hurt) has that alien burst out of his chest?

I always think of how different it would have been if I had been on that spaceship. Just as the little alien runs across the table I would have twatted it with a sledge hammer and flattened it. Then, I would have said a line that would have been immortal:  “If we had let that out of the room it would have killed everyone!”
Roll credits!

The movie would have been over in a matter of minutes and the Alien would not have gone on a rampage, nor would the crew have been slaughtered.

In other words, do not wait for the trouble your enemy will surely cause to multiply.

Nor should you waste time negotiating with them.

You have to neutralize them, eliminate them, destroy them in order to cancel their influence.

If you strike at the source then the sheep will scatter.

If you do this the followers, believers, of your enemy will be disheartend and demoralised.  You will upset the 'natural' rhythm and balance.  Their center of gravity is gone.  There is nothing left for them to orbit.

Is That A Friend Or An Enemy?

As unpallatable as this sounds, experience leads the Dynamic-Life team to advise that, you should be wary of your friends, to a certain degree and in certain circumstances.

If you are successful, as you would want to be I am sure, your friends will be prone to envy.

In many instances it is advisable that you should hire a former enemy.  They will be more loyal because they have a lot to prove.

You will also get true answers and advice.

If you have ever watched a TV talent show and heard a tone deaf singer you must have wondered who had told them they can sing and should go on the show.  So, who would have told them they were great?  Of course, their best friends!

You have more to fear from your friends than your enemies.

A friend of mine watches horror films and then tells me they are too scared to go to sleep in the dark so they leave the light on.  They won't go to ghost hunting weekends or even have a seance.

I made it clear to them once, " It's not the dead you have to worry about, they can't hurt you...it's the living you have to watch out for!"

If you are starting a business or looking to recruit and one or more of your friends are available, it's likely that you would employ them.  You know them.  Why on earth would you employ a stranger when one of your friends could be working with you?

The fact is, you do not know your friends as well as you would think or believe you do.  Friends agree with you.  They tell you how great you are.  Friends hide their unpleasant qualities so as not to offend.  Brutal honesty is not as good as it sounds so you will never get it from a friend.  If you DO, hold on to them, they are rare.

If you hire a friend you will soon discover some of these qualities and traits that have hitherto lain dormant.

You are to blame for this.  You upset the equation.  You upset the balance.

You are in business.  Or, you want to be more successful generally.  If you want a friend, get a dog.

Friendliness obscures things.  It clouds.  It obfuscates.

You have a real gold mine of talent at your fingertips, your enemies!

Exploit them.

Never ever let the presence of your enemy unbalance you.  you are better off working alongside, employing or even socializing with a declared opponent than not knowing whwer your enemies lie in wait.

Welcome conflict.  It shapes you, your relationships, your business, and your destiny.

"A wise man profits more from his enemies than a fool does from his friends." Baltasar Gracián

Live Your Life

Here's a quote that I think it sums up one of the main tenets of the Dynamic-Life Academy's approach to Human Potential Technology.

"Live your life and forget about your age. That's the difference that makes the difference. A lot of people live their age and forget they have a life!"
David Moore - Dynamic-Life Academy

It was an off the cuff remark at a Seminar in London this month and when I said it I had to stop and think about it because it came from nowhere.  Just one of those occasions when, during a seminar, a question is asked and I make some sort of comeback.

But how right is it.  Have you noticed when you watch a movie from the 60s or 70s how old people look? You think they are 50 but actually they are 35!  All the joy and energy seems to have been sucked out of them and they are older than their years.

They are not living life, they are living their age. 

If you are going to do that why not pick an age that you really enjoyed and stick at it.  OK you may get older on paper but in the mind, where it really counts, you can stay 35 or whatever age is right for you.

Don't succumb to getting old in thought.  It will not serve you.

Take risks, take chance and seize the moment.

Remember, it is NEVER too late to have a happy childhood! ;-)

IQ? EQ? IC?

I am about to turn this EQ and IQ debate on its head! 

What really is EQ, IQ and IC?

Your EQ is more important than your IQ. The IQ test may help you get a job but your EQ will help you keep it. A high IQ is around 135. A high EQ is immeasurable.

It is no surprise that there are many people with really high IQ’s working for people with really low IQ’s. The people with the low IQ also have a high EQ, Emotional Quotient, and this makes them the real leaders. They know how to get people to work together.

The high EQ people know how the whole game is played and they draw the best out of their people and they are not afraid to have the more ‘intelligent’ working for them.

Of course, the people with the high IQ know how long it takes two men to fill a bath with water halfway up a mountain in a thunderstorm but...that’s not going to improve business is it?

What would improve business?

Having the EQ skills to get the two guys to fill a bath with water halfway up a mountain in a thunderstorm in the first place!

Now although that is a great description of what EQ and IQ is (even if I say so myself ;-)) there is another definition of EQ, IQ and IC.  What's more...it's probably the most important and life changing definition there is.

What if you are working at a company and things are not going your way.  Or you may be doing something in your life but you just can't get it right.  You can't achieve what you want to achieve. Do you give up?  Do you continue to 'try' (yuck) but in your mind and heart you know that you have given up?

This is the new IQ in the world today.  So many people IQ (I Quit).  What's more, they have no idea how near to success they are when they do!

Are you the only person in your company, business, life, relationship that thinks IQ?  I bet not.  You see, it's contagious! 

Like a virus it infects everyone until, before you know it, unconsciously, EQ (Everyone Quits!).

Commit to one thing, if you commit to nothing else, commit to this...

IC!  This is the belief you need.  Your IQ and your EQ is blown away by this.

IC = I Can!

Your IC level (I CAN) is always more important than the IQ level (I QUIT) and will stop the rot of EQ in its tracks. Defeat will never be an option. So when logic is trying to point out all the excuses and reasons tell that little voice in your head that keeps telling you that you will fail, you will not succeed and you are useless to shut the fuck up. 
 
Say to yourself: My IC is unbeatable.  IC.  I CAN!

John La Valle - Pure NLP

This is a fantastic piece from John La Valle who is the co trainer and author, with Richard Bandler, of Persuasion Engineering.

Content vs. Process - a Business Perspective

John La Valle

In the natural occurrence of interacting with others, often something is missed that can have a dramatic impact on the success of each person. While most people are familiar with the terms "content and process, or even "content and form", these two contexts of application are best described as "What" and "How."In NLP terms, if we take an example of the visual modality, the "what", or content, becomes those elements, objects, that make up the image, whereas the "submodalities" of the image, the size, brightness, distance, etc. are the process. This is one way to "look at it."

Have you noticed lately that the new "buzz word" or "buzz phrase" is "it's a process, it takes a while."? That's no exactly accurate. Streamlined processes are just that: streamlined. When someone says, "It's a process . . it takes a while", or something like that, take that as an excuse that they are not getting the result and probably have no idea how to get it, or how to communicate well enough with others to help them get it. They have an opportunity to learn to communicate more precisely with others, and perhaps even with themselves.

But, how important does each of these, content vs. process, become in any dynamic relationship, including that of managing others, educating others, even including ourselves?

A few examples of how noticing the effects of each can offer the opportunity to be more effective:

If the content is "what" is said, and the process is "how we say it", then how we say something is unarguably where we have the most probable opportunity for more success. Suppose I ask you to say this sentence aloud: "What are you doing today?", using a flat intonation, notice the effect. Now, without changing the content, keeping it the same, and changing "where" in the sentence you would place more emphasis where the work is bolded, notice how easily you can change the meaning of the sentence:

"What are you doing today?"

"What are you doing today?"

"What are you doing today?"
"What are you doing today?"

"What are you doing today?"

And suffice it to say that there is no process without content. No message to convey, no words, nothing else to change.

Just think, you can listen to your favorite CD or MP3 through your portable player, but notice "how" different it sounds through you home theater system!

In business, for example, one of the more challenging problems is not only the recognition of these dynamics, but sometimes the overdoing of the process.

I get lots of opportunities to facilitate difficult situations, often between manager and employee(s). Simply put, the employee is given something (the what) to do, or what needs to be done. Most people don't mind this. It's generally known as an assignment. When the manager also includes the "how to" do it, the employee soon becomes disgruntled. Generally speaking, most people don't mind being told how to do their job as long as they are "in training", but once they are qualified, they want to liberty of doing their job the way they deem fit, etc. Now, while this doesn't mean they will always do it "correctly", when they don't, this means there is another opportunity for correction.

In the case when I get an inquiry where the potential customer calls and tells me "what" they want me to do, then continues on with "how" they want me to do it, I decline the opportunity.

So, why is it that someone's job performance ratings are determined by 2 things: what they do and how they do it. Where is more emphasis placed when it comes time for that salary increase or bonus? It's usually on both: what they accomplished and how they did it. It's also usually in the "how" they did it that was at the bottom of their successful accomplishment. In any well formed job description are 2 categories: responsibilities and role. The definitions:

Responsibilities: What the individual is required to do.

Role: How they expected to carry this out.

I can tell you now that most people have no idea what their role is for their job. When I was first a training manager in a company many years ago, my defined role was that of an internal consultant, and that role was clearly defined by my director. He expected that we carry out our jobs in Human Resources as internal consultants, and not as the "people police."

Another example: Kathleen and I were once commissioned to put together some training manuals for a company. This was based on our ability to elicit information and then present it in a way that made sense to the everyday person. Our first question to ourselves was, "How are we going to carry out this project most successfully?" The client company piled all of their manuals on us, including those from equipment manufacturers, vendors, etc., which well described their expectation of "what" should be in those manuals. But the real key was not what was going to be in the manuals, but "how" to get the employees to use them!

And so Kathleen and I decided that we would have the employees put together the new manuals. We would organize the employees, facilitate them, teach them how to elicit good information from others, give them tools for getting the information recorded, facilitating their own meetings, reaching deadlines, etc. etc. Basically, this became a large, although well organized, and well run "team building process", as well as culminating in training manuals that the employees themselves put together. We only had to publish the manuals to look like training manuals. And, of course, be responsible for the process for which we were hired and to help deliver the results.

Now you may ask, "So what good was this process?" First, all the employees had to work together to accomplish this. Second, they had training manuals that they all agreed on. Third, they didn't have to use the training manuals much because they all became trained "in the process" of putting together the training manuals. And fourth, they now had training manuals they could "use" if and when they had a question and fifth, they had credible, useable manuals when they had to train new employees because they were proud of the manuals!

Then there are meeting dynamics: What is the meeting for? How will it be conducted? And I can go on and on. The danger with paying too much attention to the process is just that. Some organizations (and governments) pay so much attention to the process that it becomes a game and nothing gets done, decisions don't get made or executed. They devote the process to the process and become overburdened with "how to do this."

Some very high performance managers we know have some of their subordinates read their mail and respond for them. Do you think this a a good "way" to develop people, or is it taking the lazy way out? Would you have them read everything? Respond to everything? Have meetings with them first to discuss "what" they've read and "how" they might respond? Is this a good career developmental process?

When subordinates have made a decision, do you argue with the decision? Do you ask "what" they decided then argue? Do you ask them "how" they decided this?

Remember, the content must be there, or there "no thing" to communicate. The process must be there in order to carry it out successfully. Both are necessary, and so now the quality issue becomes the marriage of both.

There are so many opportunities for looking at the dynamics of interactions, I'm wondering what you will notice next and how you will make changes to it for yourself.

NLP is more about "process".

PureNLP is the website you want....http://www.purenlp.com/

The Perfect Equation - Dynamic-Life Academy

Other than you, who is the enemy of your enemy?

Hmmmm, that's not something you have thought of much is it?

Think about it now.

Remember, "The enemy of my enemy is my friend"...or at least my temporary ally, united in a common cause ....

Like E=MC2...it's the perfect equation.

Sometimes these allies you don't know you have are actual physical people...and it is possible that they hate your enemy more than you do. It's logical. If you have an enemy then it's highly likely they are so odious that more people hate them than like them.

At other times these unexpected allies are psychological in nature.

Your enemies physical enemies. They are easy to spot because they are real. They are people he/ she has pissed off or else people that have pissed off him/ her. They are out to get your enemy, or at least your enemy thinks they are out to get them...perhaps because you make them think that!

Your enemies real and physical enemies can be incited against her (we shall call your enemy a her). This is known as the 'dog eat dog' ploy. This is analogous to throwing a single bone to a pair of starving hounds and is especially effective (and gratifying) when used to get one of your enemies to destroy the other, and hopefully destroying themselves in the process ;-).

The winner in such a fight will be weakened, and thus more susceptible to your attack.

You could play the double bluff and convince your enemy that the only way of defeating their real or imagined enemy is to join forces with you. This would allow you to create a whole catalogue of 'shadow enemies' to quixotically tilt against them, expending their limited resources, resources that are no longer at their disposal when they attempt to defend against your attack.

You gain an alliance by exaggerating the potential and plottings of her real - and imagined - enemies.  If she remains unresponsive to your 'peace' overtures, join her real enemies.  If possible, secretely.
 
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.

Your enemies psychological enemies. Psychological enemies are a little harder to spot. They are 'in her head', whether inherited strands of worry and phantoms of paranoia she has dragged behind her since childhood. Or they will be the entangled vines of doubt and disappointment you adeptly, adroitly, and rightly, plant in her mind thru your ability.

Unlike actual physical enemies, these psychological enemies are less tangible, and often impossible to get a grip on. What's good for your enemy is usually bad for you. on the flip side, what's bad for your enemy is bound to be good, or of advantage, for you.

Psychological disturbances are like frustration, irrational fears, and debilitating stress.  Although these are your enemy, are also your enemies enemy. Discovering that your enemy is plagued by one of these psychological enemies will not only give you insight into their thinking processes and beliefs, but will provide you with avenues for direct or oblique attack.

The enemy of my enemy really is my friend!