Don't Try This At Home, I Am A Professional

I have just 'repaired' the printer in my office by using the 'Gucci Shoe method'.

The Possessed Printer

Its very technical and not something I would recommend you attempt. You need to call in a professional like me

Basically, you open various sections of the printer and peer inside looking for evidence of a problem. Then you take the toner cartridge out, shake it, and put it back in. Then you take the cartridge out again, shake it harder (like that will make a difference) and then ram it back in so it makes a loud crashing sound in the hope that the force and noise of this will make the printer wake up.

You then close all of the various panels and flaps that you opened. You switch the power off and on and then stare at it.

Finally you take your shoe off and whack it a few times until you beat it into submission. Works every time....

...It also amazes me how some people keep pressing print when nothing comes out and then complain that the printer is broke only to find no paper in it. Then when they put the paper in 45 copies of what they wanted comes out and they moan about that!!

That's when you take your shoe off and whack THEM over the head.

I have also found that a laser printer can be bought for less than the cost of a laser toner cartridge.

I bought a laser printer and it came with a toner in it AND a spare toner.

The printer was £80 including 2 toner cartridges.
The toner cartridges are £90 if bought on their own!!!!

I now have two laser printers gathering dust in the stock cupboard as its more cost effective, when the toner runs out, to buy a new printer.

THE WORLD HAS GONE MAD!!!!