Wednesday 26 June 2013

IS YOUR BELIEF A REALITY?



IS YOUR BELIEF A REALITY?



Beliefs are, in the majority of cases, a lie. They are not the truth. The truth has to be experienced. Unless we have experienced something, it is not real.

Sometimes, the truth is so believable; people usually just believe it instead of experiencing it.

Everyone has a belief system. These systems were formed when we were children.

Here are a few you may recognize:

· Dad goes to work and Mum stays home to look after the kids.

· If you’re good you go to heaven.

· You must eat up your greens.

· You must eat three square meals a day.

· Love is never having to say you are sorry.

· Hard work is good for you.

· You will never be tall unless you stand up straight

· You will never amount to anything unless you work hard.

It is probably a result of our ingrained beliefs about what a relationship should be, as opposed to the reality of the actuality of a relationship that has resulted in the high divorce rate.

When we separate what we BELIEVE from what we EXPERIENCE we will begin to run our lives, but not before.

The problem with a belief is that we take it to be the truth. That’s fine if you imprint a belief in your mind that you will achieve, you can do it, you will attain success….but we have thousands of other beliefs that do not serve us. Those ‘other’ beliefs are detrimental and if we take THEM to be the truth we could get stuck in them.

In other words most of us persist in thinking and doing what we learnt long ago, rather than acting out of our experience in response to whatever is happening now.

A classic story illustrates this point:

A man watches his wife cutting an inch off the end of the Lamb bone before putting it in the oven to roast. After watching her do this a few times before, her husband asks her why. She tells him that her mother always did it that way. A few weeks later the husband asks his Mother-In-Law why she cuts an inch off the end of the lamb bone. She tells him, “My mother always did it that way.” The Grandmother is very old, in her 90’s, and when the husband and wife visit her one day he asks her the same question. “Your granddaughter, and your daughter, cut an inch off the end of the lamb bone before they put the lamb in the oven. They do it because you always did. Why did you do that?”

The old lady looks at the husband and says, “Well, in those days, I had a very small oven and the leg of lamb wouldn’t fit unless I cut an inch off the end of the bone!”

Most people are cutting an inch off the end of something in their lives to fit into an oven that’s no longer too small for it.

Most people are stuck in a melodramatic soap opera of their lives with the same four or five problems they have always had. The bigger problem is that they continue with beliefs that have been carved into their minds since childhood and they are the reason they keep repeating the behaviour.

Here is a frightening example:
You trip over when you are five years old and cut your knee and your mother says, 'Don't cry; crying is bad," so you don't cry. Then you have a fall while skiing when you are 17 and you break your leg but you keep a stiff upper lip and you don't cry because crying is bad. Then when you are 24 you break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, and you really thought that they were 'the one' and you STILL don't cry.
The more you repress your feelings the more your consciousness shuts down. You become barely alive. You act like a zombie. You function mechanically and get a reputation as 'a bit of a cold fish'.
The reality is that as you function mechanically more and more, in some cases, you become successful at it. Here's a reality check: Mechanical success is not any more satisfying than failure.
I took my psychology training years ago and therapy has always been concerned with the way people are run, or how they function, by what was rather than what is and how to free people from their past. That never sat comfortably with me. I know hundreds of people who trained just like me and never questioned it.
There are 2 reasons they didn't question it:
1. FEAR! As in: 'Don't make waves....if you question it they will flunk you.'
and
2. Cut the end of the bone off the Leg of Lamb!
What do I mean by that? Think about it.
That's right: It has ALWAYS been done that way, so there must be a good reason for it.

How does HPT (Human Potential Transformation) differ from Therapy? Therapy is concerned with curing people of an 'illness' whereas HPT offers people an experience of themselves, and the ability to design a future.
It is evident from my travels and studies, and from the Transformational Change work I have done in the last two years which, I admit, has become more extreme and direct, that Belief Systems are, by and large, a myth.
Belief Systems are created by knowledge or data without experience.
If you experience something, it is real for you.
If you communicate it to somebody, it is real for them because you are expressing your experience.
If they tell it to someone else, it's a lie. It is merely a belief without the component of experience.
A belief is a very powerful thing. You can kill or you can cure with one. I have earned my living for many years training people to believe in themselves, which is good. You CAN believe in yourself because you have the experience of yourself, you are your own reality. I can prove to you, from my beliefs, that what I think and see is true.
I ask people what they expect to get out of the training program and the list can be very diverse. Some say they want to get to know themselves, some say they want to make better decisions, have more self confidence, be more decisive, fall in love, be more open, sell more product, be a better leader or manager....
What they ALL have in common is a set of expectations!
They truly believe that their happiness is dependant on more love, money, power, sex, self confidence, etc. Each has a belief system that relates satisfaction to something they are striving for.
The REALITY is that their happiness is a function of accepting what is, and make it separate from what was and what is to come.
Belief is a structure which can contain very little information in terms of making it useful in your consciousness or well-being.
HPT works on Observation and not Belief. Observation has nothing to do with the senses, perceptions or belief systems. It only deals with direct experience...REALITY.
One of the core HPT Observations is that Life can be considered to be three foot long, and the first two feet eleven inches are about the material aspects of life (food,clothing and shelter) and what's known as 'psychological needs'. You need someone to love you and someone you can love back. You need self esteem, recognition and respect from others.
After people fill their needs they start to look what it MEANS to fill their needs. They start to realize that there is no true satisfaction in just filling your needs and they look beyond that. And THAT is the last inch. THAT is what HPT is all about.
It is the last inch, that has been cut off the bone again and again. That Inch is the life changer.

That last inch is where we discover TRANSFORMATION.

Friday 14 June 2013

Jersey Telecom Call Charges

Boy do they charge for data in Jersey?

£5.00 for 10mb of data.

Thanks to O2 the roaming only applies to making and receiving calls and texts.  If you want to email or use social media then you need a second mortgage as 10mb goes nowhere.  Once you load it onto your phone it can be wiped out in minutes if you have a backlog of emails, twitter and facebook messages and any other social media stuff like Google+. 

Whats more you cannot call 4444 from your mobile to top up if your call time is wiped as you will not connect to O2!  You need the full O2 number which you can only find if you can surf the internet on your phone,but, as you have no data because you need to top up, you CANT get the internet so you are in a vicious circle. Should you have it stored on your phone, you are still out of luck, as it costs 50p to call it!

Thanks O2!

Technology expert at uSwitch.com Ernest Doku said,
“Holidaymakers need to add ‘check roaming charges’ to their pre-holiday to do lists. Talking to your network before you jet off will very likely spare you a nasty post-holiday bill shock, as they may be able to advise a bundle, or at the very least let you know the costs involved with using your phone abroad.”

“Not knowing which countries are in the European Union could cause havoc for mobile users this summer. A third of us know about roaming caps, but if those people don’t realise that summer sun destinations like Turkey or Croatia aren’t in the EU, they could wrongly think they are protected from roaming charges.”

“Limit the damage by keeping data roaming switched off as much as possible. And, when it comes to calls and text messages, the best way to keep costs down to a minimum is to buy a local SIM card, put it in your phone and top it up. If you want to use the internet, wait until you can get Wi-Fi at a hotel or cafĂ©.”

As Jersey is part of the United Kingdom you would THINK that roaming and extra data charges ON TOP of a Bolt on would not apply.  Ha!  NO! Give O2 an opportunity to rake in a little extra cash and they will.  How do I know this?  Because O2 send you a text telling you your Data is about to run out.  They can tell you that your Data is running out and you need to buy another £5.00 worth but they cannot take a call.  you have to top up online.

If you go to Jersey DO NOT TOP UP A £5 DATA BY TEXTING BBROAM TO 21300...IT WILL BE GONE IN MINUTES AND WILL COST YOU A FORTUNE.

get your iPad or LapTop out and find the wi-fi in your hotel....it's free.

Saturday 8 June 2013

A Ship is meant to Sail the Seas

St Helier Harbour
As I sit an look out from the balcony of my hotel suite in St Helier I can see this view on the right

So many boats, from small speedboats to Sunseeker powerboats and larger, are docked here.  Many people live on board their boats and yachts over here in Jersey in the Channel Islands.

I have heard that some of the boats, like a few of the ones moored in Marbella and Puerto Banus, have had their engines removed to allow for the installation of a second or third bedroom.

The ones that still have a working engine, but sit idle in the harbour, are at the greatest risk.  A ship, boat or yacht is meant to be at sea. 

If left in dock, unused, not taken to its fullest capacity on the sea, it will deteriorate.  Not only that, but it will deteriorate at a far more rapid rate than if it was sailed every single day.  It is meant to be used, enjoyed, and out of the safety or calm of the harbour.

Do you sit in your own personal harbour?  Are you a leader that is office bound by choice?  Do you believe that your team should be out sailing around while you wait patiently for their return?  Perhaps you choose to stay in port, never venturing out into the world?


Have you considered the damage this is doing to you? 

You are a leader.  You are a salesperson.  You are....well, whatever you do for a living, you have to realise a cold hard fact.

If you do not leave the confines of the dock your skills will deteriorate faster than a boat will deteriorate if it is never taken out of the port.

The brain is a muscle, it needs to be exercised.  The same goes for your talents, your knowledge and your ability.  You need to use it, engage with people and make change on a day to day consistant basis.

Don't end up in dry dock.  POWER UP, GO OUT ON THE SEA AND USE YOUR SKILLS NOW!

Friday 7 June 2013

HOW DO YOU WANT YOUR TEAM IN THE MORNING-POACHED OR SCRAMBLED?


One of the biggest issues we have as Leaders is our people.  Our teams.

It is not only the recruiting but the retaining of our people that we as leaders have to concentrate on.  What makes a team of people exceptional or, at the very least, effective?

Recruitment is a major issue.  More so than at any other time.  I have never seen so many recruitment companies as there are these days.  When you look at the amount of recruitment sites and companies around you get a clear understanding as to why it is so difficult for people to get a position these days, as sometimes 50 different companies are propelling people towards the same opportunity.

I have been a Sales Trainer and Seminar Leader for almost 25 years.  As a Sales Trainer I can tell you with 100% authority, recruitment of the right people is the biggest issue.  All the sales training in the world will not make someone who is not interested in the role better at it. 

I read a sign once that said ‘You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink.  You can lead someone to knowledge but you can’t make them THINK!’

Although it doesn’t rhyme there is also the line ‘You can give someone ability but you can’t make them use it!’ which would fit nicely on the end of that.

As leaders we have to be pretty savvy when interviewing people.  We have to listen very carefully at what the candidate is NOT saying just as much as what they are saying.  We also have to consider that this person may be fantastic at interviews but not at the job itself.

People spend so much time and effort planning and organising a two week vacation but make no plans for the other 50 weeks of the year.  Couples spend so much time, energy and money on a wedding but have no idea how to STAY married.  Likewise, people spend so much time and energy on getting the job when they have no real idea of how to do it or keep it.

One of the most simple and plain truths there is in recruiting the right people is to look for them rather than let them come to you. 

Having a team of people with scrambled abilities and dedication is a nightmare…consistency is what you need.  A company needs a minimum level of ability in its people. 

You may need to consider looking at other companies, other businesses, and target their people.

Hey, controversial huh? 

Poaching?  No!  It is all about giving people alternatives. 

The BEST businesses in the world have the best….….PEOPLE.  Period.  You cannot sit around waiting for these people to come to you.  Go and get them.  Create your team of excellence.  Design and mould a team of infinite ability and then train them in the ways of your company.

It is necessary for your people to have the ability to learn and the mindset of an achiever.  You can give them all the knowledge, tips, techniques, strategies and tools in the world.  They have to be capable at some level already to be able to go to the next stage with you. 

I know that a motivated idiot is the most dangerous person to have in any business.  The saddest is a person with all the ability in the world but no desire to use it.

If you want a high performing business you need to recruit and retain high performing people.  It is a well-known fact that one great person can outperform 100 good people.  Can you imagine the amount of change in a company if just one of the leaders from #bealeader was recruited by an average business?

The bottom line is this: If you want a team of excellent people you need to hire excellent people.

I visit the Pomme d’Or hotel in Jersey in the Channel Islands every couple of months.  Their staff can never do enough for their guests.  They have a level of service that exceeds excellence.  They call your room every now and then and ask if everything is fine.  There is a smile on the face of every member of the team.

I said to the Manager one day: ‘your people are so friendly, always willing to help and always smiling and happy to see people.  What do you do to train your people to be so friendly?’

She said, ‘We don’t train our people to be friendly.  We just hire friendly people!’

Wow! How simplistic is that?  Of course, that can be translated into ‘We just hire THE RIGHT people.’

Wednesday 5 June 2013

The Psychiatric Hotline Answer Service

Hello and welcome to the mental health hotline
  • If you are Obsessive Compulsive , press 1 repeatedly.
  • If you are Co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
  • If you have Multiple Personalities, press 3, 4, 5 & 6.
  • If you are Paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
  • If you are Delusional, press 7, and your call will be transferred to the Mother Ship.
  • If you are Schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
  • If you are Dyslexic, press 96969696969696.
  • If you have a Nervous Disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.
  • If you have Amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number and your mother's and grandmothers' maiden names.
  • If you have Post-traumatic Stress Disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.
  • If you have Bi-polar Disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
  • If you have Short Term Memory Loss, please try your call again later.
  • If you have Low Self Esteem, please hang up. All our operators are far too busy to talk to you.
  • If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer

Tuesday 4 June 2013

Impact of a Presentation

(c) HPT-Transformation - David Van Moore (uk) Ltd
This is the breakdown of how your communication is received.  Sometimes it is not what you say...but HOW you say it!

Monday 3 June 2013

PAYPAL and Flights rip-off

Beware these Rip Offs :


I called PayPal the other day....I was on the phone querying something as usual as their website is a very backward in coming forward with clear information and now I know WHY!!!!
Today I find the true cost that a call to their number 09838381050 is!  (Thankfully it has now been changed - but it still costs a fortune to connect to it to be told of yet another number) What's more, PayPal do not tell you how much the call is going to be per minute....
A 9 minute call to that number from a LAND LINE cost £16.86!!!!!!!!

If you book a flight online and use a cowboy outfit called eDreams then you will live to regret it.  They automatically book the flight without luggage allowance.  When you attempt to correct it online you cannot get access to your account even though you have set one up.  The screen tells you to call them on 09116992020...where all the people have portugeuse accents.What's more, eDreams do not tell you how much the call is going to be per minute....
the idiot at their office suggested I create a new account but it was obvious to me that if I did that I would not be able to access the account with the flights as the computer would not connect my new account with the old one.  Even though I had the code they had sent me, and the reference they had sent me, eDreams could not assist in any way whatsoever. The idiot seemed to be saying whatever he thought up next but had no real clue as to how it worked.
An 18 minute call to that number from a Land Line cost £32.16!!!!!

THERE IS A WORD FOR COMPANIES LIKE THIS..!

Have you noticed that companies have a hold message that says 'your call is important to us'?
What they really mean is 'the money from this call is important to us'!