Tuesday, 14 November 2006

CRECHE TEST DUMMIES

Call me old fashioned.
Call me boring.
Hey, call me a typical man…but;

Why the hell do women feel the need to bring their new babies into work?

Sometimes I walk into receptions and they are littered with ankle biters. Some women who have just had the sprog feel compelled to bring it in and show it off to everyone, as if the others had never seen a baby before! We all know what they are, lady! They leak at both ends, screech the place down for no reason and look like mini versions of Winston Churchill. I sometimes stop in my tracks because I feel like I have walked into a crèche. The place is full of them. Looking at some of them, the parents would be better off pitching a tent and charging admission than bringing them in to show off!

The place is full of lots of people, mainly women, gazing at it and going ‘ooh’ and ‘aaah’ and then, and you will not want to agree with me on this but this is absolutely bang on…when the woman crashes out of the door with the buggy, having taken a layer of paint off of the door frames, and everyone is wondering just what did make those stains on the sofas, the women who were giving it ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ all now look at each other and say ‘did you notice it's eyes, yeeek’ and ‘that baby doesn’t look right to me’ and ‘no way is that her old man’s’…or some other low blow.

Ladies, remember, and this is the real fact of life. If you have a baby it’s your choice. No one else really cares. Any affection it receives is fake as it’s from people who have other things to do and are only being polite. It’s not the first one to be born and you ain’t the first one to have one.

All we want to know as an employer who is still paying your wages is….when are you coming back to EARN your money??


When is 'Eternity' Leave OVER???


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